Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 45328 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 227(@200wpm)___ 181(@250wpm)___ 151(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 45328 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 227(@200wpm)___ 181(@250wpm)___ 151(@300wpm)
But all I could think of in all honesty was that I couldn’t believe I was here. And not in my usual pessimistic way either.
I was actually starting to feel that rush from before. The one where I couldn’t wait to see her at the end of the day. Or wait to meet her somewhere as a last minute surprise.
“I can’t give you my answer right now. I still have a lot to think about. But what I will say is this. If you’re serious about wanting us to get back together, there are some things we have to discuss, some ground rules if you will.”
“But why. It’s not like we haven’t lived together before…”
“That’s just it. We’re not going to be living together.”
“But…”
“And that’s another thing. No more interrupting me when I speak. You want to do this, you’re gonna do it my way. Then I’ll decide if I want to take you back or not.”
“Remember, this is your idea, but if you start it, you don’t get to end it this time, I do. But if at any time you do feel like you want out, you’re free to go. Just don’t ever expect to see me again.”
I turned and headed for the door. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Be fucking here or we’re done.” For some fucked up reason I chose that moment to kiss her.
Not one of the pecks I’d given her earlier to calm her down, but a real tongue twisting, breath stealing tonsil cleaning heck of a kiss.
I know why I did it. Fool that I am, I wanted her to feel secure while I left her tonight. I didn’t want her worrying that I was going to desert her.
All that night I thought of the best way to go forward. The only thing I knew for sure was that I was not going to do things the way I had before.
This time I’m not gonna let feelings get in the way. She might want things to change, but I wasn’t quite sure that that’s what I wanted.
I didn’t call her the next day, Sunday. I spent the day with my dog and catching up on other things that had nothing to do with my wife.
I didn’t call her the next day before going in to the office either. I wouldn’t say she was out of mind completely, but something had shifted and for the first time since I was served with divorce papers, I felt like I was on solid ground again.
For the first half of the morning I couldn’t concentrate on work, my mind just kept going around in circles.
Finally at around lunch time I came up with an idea and ran out of the office without a goodbye to my secretary.
Jillian hadn’t called all day and I knew she was at home worrying and pacing. I headed to the nearest shopping district and spent an hour finding what I needed before heading out to her place.
She met me at the door looking less sure of herself than in the past few weeks. I dropped the bags on the couch and turned to find her looking at me with uncertainty.
“Come.” I held out my hand for her to take and sat her on the couch while I stayed standing in front of it. I gave myself some time to gather my thoughts, to put things the right way so there was no misunderstanding.
“From now on when I come here I want you to be waiting for me. I don’t care what time of the day it is, or what you’re doing. When I call you better be here or know how to find your way here from wherever you are before I arrive.”
For once she had the good sense to keep her mouth shut, which was a good thing because it wouldn’t have done her any good anyway.
“If you question me at any time for any reason, I’m gone. You do what I say, when I say without question. If I want your opinion I’ll ask for it.”
“The first time you say no to me will be the last time you say no to me. I will fuck you when I want, where I want and how I want. No questions asked.”
“The only time your pussy is off limits, are the days you have your period, the rest of the time it’s mine. Mine to do with as I please. I own you, every single inch of you. Understood?”
She nodded her head still looking a bit bemused. I didn’t bother asking her if she agreed to my terms. I didn’t just put myself through all that to make a fool of myself. She didn’t have a fucking choice.
I held her eyes as I pulled my tie loose and undid the buttons of my shirt. When her hands went to her own clothes I stopped her.