Total pages in book: 151
Estimated words: 139803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 699(@200wpm)___ 559(@250wpm)___ 466(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 139803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 699(@200wpm)___ 559(@250wpm)___ 466(@300wpm)
She could hate me all she wanted. It hurt like a mother fucker, but I could deal, and I knew that with time, I could move on, though I knew I would always miss her.
But the baby we created?
I would never let her detest it—would never let our child know the pain of its’ parent hating it.
* * *
✶ ✶ ✶
* * *
I slid out of my car in front of my dad’s house. He was sitting on the front porch smoking a blunt, and I desperately needed one. I was torn between forcing Meghan to take her words back and destroying something as badly as she had destroyed my heart and soul with her words.
Love me?
What a load of fucking shit.
My dad stood up from his chair and pushed open the screen door, letting me onto the screened in area. “Surprised to see you here, kid. Don’t you have class in the morning?”
I shrugged. “I want to be anywhere but there,” I grunted as I dropped into the other chair.
Wordlessly, my dad passed me the blunt that was between his fingers. I took a hit, dragging the smoke into my lungs. “What the fuck happened to make you drive four hours to come here, Julian?” my dad asked me.
“Women,” I muttered.
He chuckled as he took the blunt back, taking a hit. “Yeah, well, can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em,” he commented. It was silent for a moment. A car passed by with the bass pounding so loud, it shook my teeth, and a dog began barking somewhere down the road.
“Julian, is this about the girl you killed that man for?” he bluntly asked me.
I scowled and nodded my head. “Yeah.” I leaned forward and placed my elbows on my knees as I pushed my fingers through my curly, black hair. “He fucking raped her,” I growled.
“Like father, like son,” Dad said quietly. I didn’t respond. He sighed. “Love makes us do crazy shit. And you do love her, don’t you?”
I released a bitter laugh. “Unfortunately. I love her with every fiber of my being. I’ve been nothing but honest with her from day one, and yet, the bitch fucking played me along like a fucking puppet.” I jumped up from my chair and paced to the other end of the porch, glaring out at the neighbor’s yard. I couldn’t sit still. “I’m Julian fucking Markos. I don’t get played, and yet she did it so fucking effortlessly.”
“Tell me about the fight.”
I clenched my jaw. “We’ve been on edge together since my game Saturday night. She’d been pushing herself too hard for the past two weeks before that, and I tried over and over to warn her, to get her to slow down.”
“Why?” Dad asked. “She’s used to that, right?”
I nodded. “She’s pregnant,” I informed him.
“Fucking hell, kid,” Dad snapped, irritation lacing his words. “Did I not teach you shit about wrapping your dick up?”
I shoved my fingers through my hair again, my body filled with tension. “Fuck, Dad, she’d been avoiding me after she was raped that night. Vincent set her up, basically forced her to be alone with me. She was so fucking tore up inside. I couldn’t fucking stand it.” He stayed quiet, listening to me. “I slipped up in the heat of the moment. The one time I didn’t use one, she ended up pregnant.”
“And how did you react to the news?”
I shrugged. “Fine, I guess,” I admitted. “I was shocked, yeah, but I think she was more fucked up over it than I was. I just took it in stride.”
“You always took the biggest shit in stride,” Dad remembered. “So, you guys had a fight. Let’s get back to that.”
“She passed out in the middle of the dance she was performing at halftime,” I told him. “She pushed herself too hard. She never let me know what orders the doctor gave her, but I found out today when I finally forced her to talk to me.”
“And the orders were?” he asked when I didn’t continue—didn’t because it hurt so goddamn much.
“Her doctor is ordering her to cut back on dance. It’s her lifeline,” I explained. “Dancing is her way of coping and forgetting all of the bad shit surrounding her.” I snorted, shaking my head. “That’s when she also told me that our kid was ruining her life. That I was, too.” I swallowed thickly. “She wishes she had never met me, and she’s pretty fucking heated about being pregnant.”
“And your response?”
I shrugged. “I walked away. Told her to get her shit and get out and that I would see her in about eight months in a courtroom.”
Dad sighed, shaking his head. He took a moment to think. “Fuck, that’s a mess. Not like you to walk away, Julian. You’ve always fought hard for something you wanted.”