Total pages in book: 38
Estimated words: 35763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 179(@200wpm)___ 143(@250wpm)___ 119(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 35763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 179(@200wpm)___ 143(@250wpm)___ 119(@300wpm)
“So you’re going to go for it?”
“Would that bother you?” I hadn't thought about that. It’s her uncle, after all.
“Only because I worry.”
“Oh.” Shit.
“About you, Teddy. He’s older, and your first whatever this is. I don’t want to call him a boyfriend, because he’s not a boy. What do adults call it?”
“A lover?” I suggest. “But that sounds deeper. I mean, we only fell asleep together. Nothing has happened between us,” I remind her. Yet it feels as though we have some sort of connection. Or maybe I’ve made more of it than it is. I have so many questions of my own that it’s hard to explain.
"One evening, he was suddenly watching reality TV with you and cuddling, despite the fact that he rarely communicates with anyone and prefers to remain in his wing. That is more than only worthy.”
“I don’t want to get ahead of myself is all.” I shrug. I can feel that I’m falling fast for him, which is insane. I’m always the sane and rational one.
“You can take it slow,” Willa suggests. It’s a smart idea, hell, a good one even, but everything inside of me is screaming to do the opposite. All day I have thought about kissing him. Then my thoughts become jumbled.
He’d be my first kiss. What if I was terrible at it? He’s ten years older than me. I’m sure he’s kissed a bunch of girls. Not girls—women who are his own age and have an equal amount of experience. I know he has to be having an inner battle about my age already. Him realizing I’ve never been kissed because I suck at it would only fuel that fire.
I push all of those thoughts to the back of my mind. If I continue down that path, I’ll drive myself insane for no reason. I already know that I’m going to pursue whatever this is between me and West. The attraction I have for him is too strong. I want him, and for once in my life, I’m going to put myself first.
“I don’t know if going slow is an option. Have you seen how handsome he is?”
“Gross.” Willa’s whole face scrunches.
“If you find it so gross, does that mean you’re seeing him as family?”
“He looks like my brother.” Shit, he really kind of does.
“I’ve never been attracted to Rich.” That’s kind of interesting.
It makes me believe that there is so much more to attraction than people can comprehend. I want to believe that attraction can go more in depth than people realize. Two souls recognize each other on a deeper level even before you get to truly know the other person. A bit of fate, I suppose. Maybe I need to lay off the romance books.
“He told me that I look like his mother, my grandmother.” Damn, now I can understand that softness I always see on West’s face when he talks to Willa or even glances her way. He must be seeing his mom. I wonder if that is good or bad for him. It could be a painful reminder or possibly a pleasant one.
“Really?” There aren’t photos around the house like you’d find in the guesthouse with Mom and me. We have them everywhere, but the Haven main residence has never been that way. It’s cold. The twins' bedrooms are the only areas where personal touches are present.
“He said he has some pictures he’ll get me copies of. I’m curious, you know?” Willa shrugs her shoulders. “We have no clue about our mom, but now I can see the face of a woman from my family.”
“I get that.” There are a couple of pictures of my father that my mom kept for me. I at least had an idea of who he was. I’m sure he’s changed over the years, but I have never had the desire to search him out. He clearly hasn’t wanted any contact either. I have always had a dislike for him because he’d been so much older than my mom when he got her pregnant.
“Oh shit,” I breathe out.
“What?”
“It just hit me that my birth father was about ten years older than my mom when he got her pregnant with me.” Yeah, I don’t think my mom will be okay with any of this.
“Yikes.” Willa cringes. "But she was only fifteen when she gave birth to you."
“I don’t know.” I pick up my shake and take a giant drink.
When we’re done with our shakes, we head back towards the estate. “You’re thinking really loud over there,” Willa tells me when we enter through the gates.
“I don’t want to upset my mom.” She has devoted her life to me.
Everything has always been about us. The woman works and has never had much of a social life outside of hanging out with her sister before she moved away. I’ve never done anything to disappoint her. Hell, I don’t think I have ever been in trouble. She sacrificed so much to bring me into this world. I never wanted to upset her, so I made sure to keep on the straight and narrow.