Before Us Read Online Jewel E. Ann

Categories Genre: Angst, Contemporary, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 110
Estimated words: 106798 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 534(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 356(@300wpm)
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“Me?” Zach narrows his eyes.

“I know you’re okay. I do. But what if you’re not? What if you get a bad case of the blues? People do, ya know. It can be months, even years, after losing a spouse. I just need to know that if that happens, you’ll call me to talk. Or your family.”

Zach chuckles, still wiping my face with his thumbs. “Please don’t worry about me. I’m good. I’ll be fine. I’ll hold my shit together. If for no one else, I’ll do it for Harry Pawter.”

“I know. Sorry.” I pull away. “It’s stupid. I’m stupid for acting this way. Maybe it’s just the flight. It’s a really long flight.”

“Em?”

I glance up at him.

“You left the milk out last night, but I put it away.”

It takes me a few seconds to realize what he’s doing. It’s the same thing I did to him behind the shed. A whiplash subject change to lighten the mood. To make me smile. So that’s what I do. I smile. I can’t help it. “Sorry,” I say on a tiny laugh. “It won’t happen again.”

I didn’t have milk last night. He just … gets me.

Zach purses his lips and nods. “Good. I hope not.”

That makes me giggle a little more.

“Now, get going.”

“Yeah.” As I reach for the handle of my suitcase, Zach grabs my other hand, turning me back to him.

My gaze goes right to my hand in his, then I find his eyes. They’re contemplative, making me feel things I know I shouldn’t feel. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

“Suzanne would be so proud of you. And she would tell you to get on that plane and not look back.”

More tears sting my eyes as I nod. I know. I know she’d be proud of me. “And you? What do you say?”

He blows a quick breath out his nose and smiles. “I’d say listen to Suzanne. Have fun. This was the life you were born to live. But be smart.”

I return another nod.

“Call if you need anything. If I’m flying, I’ll get back to you as soon as I land. Okay?”

Again, I nod in lieu of speaking actual words that would choke me up. If he doesn’t release my hand, I’m going to melt into a puddle at his feet, and it will be way more than the allotted ounces of liquid to be carried onto a plane.

I’m leaving my husband because I’m twenty-four and need to find my own life.

I’m leaving my husband because I owe it to my dreams to chase them until I catch them.

I’m leaving my husband because … he’s not real.

Zach releases my hand and hugs me.

For a brief second, I stiffen, but the way I feel in his embrace feels too right not to relax into it, not to inhale him, not to miss him already.

“I’ll work hard so this job leads to something permanent. Insurance. Or a husband so you can be free of me for good.”

Zach releases me as a few wrinkle lines form along his forehead. “Just … follow your dreams. Make that your job and let the rest work its way out.” He doesn’t address the husband comment. Really, what do I expect him to say?

I love you, Emersyn. And you already have a husband.

He doesn’t say that, so I take my suitcase handle again. “Okay.” I smile, thinking of Suzie’s final words to me. Goodbyes suck. I didn’t say it to her, and I’m not saying it to Zach.

His smile barely moves his lips, but it’s still there as he nods like that’s his goodbye. No words, just a tiny acknowledgment.

Throwing my weight into it, I lug my stuff toward the door.

“Emersyn?”

My heart crashes into its cage with the velocity of my sudden turn. Then it completely stops beating for a few breaths to hear what he has to say. “Yeah?”

I wait for him to say something unforgettable, something romantic. I wait for him to say fuck it and rush toward me, taking me in his arms and kissing me with abandon. But my fairy-tale thoughts are just that—a fairy tale.

I wait.

And wait.

His gaze wanders to the side as if he’s searching for the words. The lines on his forehead deepen while he bites his lips between his teeth.

It’s … killing me!

When his gaze returns to mine, he offers a second helping of that barely detectable smile. “I love that hoodie on you. It brings out the blue in your eyes. And you have … nice eyes.”

Seriously … my heart is on the verge of a prison break, but I gather my composure and cant my head to the side, feigning emotional confidence. “Mr. Hays, are you trying to give me a little bounce?”

Zach's smile doubles as he shrugs one shoulder. “Maybe.”

“I like your …” My lips twist for a second, then I shake my head slowly and head toward the automatic doors.


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