Total pages in book: 143
Estimated words: 130275 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 651(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 130275 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 651(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
It was for me too.
Sitting in silence, we watched the winter sun begin to ebb and darkness cloak the top of the peaks, chasing down the hills and spreading out onto the lake before us. Stars tried to peek through the overcast sky, and the moon hid its glow behind thick unrelenting clouds.
I shivered, the lowering sun taking away any heat from the winter’s day and plunging the night into bitter coldness. Cael must have noticed, because he turned his head, lips grazing my ear and said, “We’d better get inside.”
I nodded but didn’t move for a few moments, not wanting to break from this pleasant numbness we had slipped into. But when a gust of arctic wind found its way into the jetty, we had no choice.
Straightening, I reluctantly released Cael’s hand and got to my feet. Cael followed suit, picked up Poppy’s notebook then handed it back to me. I met his eyes then. The first time since we had sat down and spilled our mutual heartaches.
There was something new in his stare. Like he was seeing me differently. I certainly was him. Gone was the unapproachable boy from just outside of Boston. And in his place was Cael Woods, a broken boy who was mourning the tragic death of his big brother. Despite how different we were on the surface, underneath it all, we were kindred souls.
Cael slipped his hand through mine again, and the chill that had taken us under siege was fought back by a striking sword of warmth. Cael led the way from the jetty and toward the hostel. The frosty ground crisped underfoot. I looked up to the sky and the dark clouds that impeded the view of the stars.
I walked as lonely as a cloud … Wordsworth’s poem came to my head. As we entered the hostel and separated reluctantly at the top of stairs to go to our respective rooms, I realized that maybe I wasn’t as lonely as I believed I was.
And neither was he.
I couldn’t help but recall how he’d been when I’d shouted at him. My fury … it hadn’t offended him—it had called to him. In that moment, I’d been a living reflection of how he felt inside. I’d burned with grief like he’d burned.
He’d seen me, and in depths of my despair, I had understood him too. And he had calmed. He’d confided in me.
Cael … He was suffering so badly …
After I showered, I climbed into bed. Curiosity won out; I took hold of my cell phone and searched the internet for Cael’s name. Hundreds and hundreds of hits appeared. The first picture shown was from a couple of years ago, and I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was dressed in hockey gear. But he was free of tattoos, free of piercings … free of grief. His wide, infectious smile was breathtaking. But what made my chest tighten to the point of snapping was the person beside him, the one with his arm wrapped proudly around him.
Cillian.
I ran my finger over Cael’s boyish, carefree face. Then I froze when I read the caption. The Future of Hockey. Harvard’s star center, Cillian Woods, with younger brother Cael.
Harvard.
The next story made my heart fall further. Cael Woods heading for Harvard! The Woods Brothers go Crimson!
The article explained that Cillian had gone to Harvard. Cael had signed on to go too. Cael was a year older than me. Harvard … That was why he’d brought us in from the lake that day. I’d told him I was going too … but he’d clearly not gone. It didn’t take a genius to understand why.
A sense of something bigger than me danced above my head. I wasn’t one to believe in something unworldly, but I couldn’t deny the serendipitous nature of our meeting. There was something about Cael Woods that had called to me from the moment I saw him. Drew me to him like a moth to a flame.
Made me want to protect him and help carry the weight of his broken heart.
With an aching soul, I turned off my cell phone, already feeling guilty about encroaching on his life this way. I shouldn’t have done it. But I couldn’t shed the image of his carefree smile from his face. Couldn’t stop thinking of Cillian with his arm around Cael, smiling at his younger brother like the proudest sibling in the world. I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to him to believe that death was his only way out of whatever plagued him. I wondered if Cael even knew.
I brought the phone to my chest, like I could embrace young Cael through the screen. Hold him before his world was blown apart. My head was a tornado of thoughts, haphazardly lapping around one another. Poppy’s face came to my mind. Right now, I would have talked to her. She would have known what to say.