Total pages in book: 167
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
I look up to the front door and see my mum and dad standing on the porch watching us. Their faces are both sad. I know Mum can’t bear seeing me like this. I try to disguise my devastation, but there’s nothing a son can keep from his mother, whether he’s ten or fifty.
I give my father a strained smile when he raises his hand, telling me he’s got it covered, so diverting the kids away from the door, I walk them down to the garden and sit them on the bench overlooking Dad’s vegetable patch.
‘She’s trying so hard to get better for you both,’ I tell them. ‘And I need to help her do that.’
‘You mean remember us,’ Maddie corrects me, holding my hand as if she could fall down a hole if she let go of me. She’s keeping me from falling down that hole, too.
I nod, not prepared to lie, and crouch down in front of them, squeezing their hands. ‘You see, there’s a small part of Mum’s brain that’s not quite working properly at the moment.’
‘Because of the bang on her head?’ Jacob asks.
‘Yes, because of that. It’s like the key’s jammed, keeping the memories all locked up. I need to unjam that key.’
Maddie’s bottom lip starts to tremble, and her eyes fill with sad tears. ‘How could she forget us, Daddy?’
If at any point in my life I’ve wanted to rip my heart out and serve it at the feet of hope, then it’s now. This moment, looking at my children who are so devastated. ‘She hasn’t forgotten you,’ I tell them firmly, constricting my hold of their hands. ‘She’s just momentarily misplaced her memories. I’m going to help her find them, I promise. Tell me you believe me. Tell me you trust your daddy.’
Both of them nod, and I reach forward to yank them both into my chest, cuddling them with a force like no other. I’m strong. I need them to feel my strength.
‘Nan and Pap are going to take you to the coast for a week or two while I help Mum, okay? You’ll love it down in Newquay. You need to have some fun. Take Pap surfing and help Nan catch some sandworms.’
‘Pap can’t surf,’ Jacob chuckles through his tears, the sound washing over me like the best kind of medicine. ‘And Nan’s scared of sandworms.’
I cluck his cheek. ‘Then make sure you hide one in her handbag.’
‘She’ll know you told us to do it.’ Maddie rolls her red eyes before rubbing under them. ‘She’ll curse you to hell again.’
‘I’m already going to hell in your nan’s eyes.’ I rub some hair away from Maddie’s face and ruffle Jacob’s mop. ‘Look after them for your mum, yeah?’
Jacob moves in and takes his sister’s hand, a sign of their solidarity and determination. My babies. ‘And you’ll look after Mum? Help her?’ he asks.
‘I promise.’
‘How do we know she’ll ever remember us?’ Maddie, my little live wire, my spirited, defiant little madam, isn’t as sure as her brother, and seeing her take the comfort Jacob is offering shreds me and warms me at the same time.
‘Because your dad said she will,’ I cough through my closing throat. ‘And what your dad says is law.’
‘We know,’ they say in unison, looking at each other and smiling, as if silently agreeing that they trust me.
Which is good, because they should.
And I will not let them down.
Chapter 12
I arrive at the hospital to find Ava’s doctor speaking with the head nurse. She nods, he nods, she speaks, he speaks, she frowns, he frowns.
‘Everything okay?’ I ask as I near.
‘We were just going to call you.’
I’m instantly worried. ‘Why?’ I look across to Ava’s room, seeing her sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed and waiting, her fingers spinning her wedding ring.
‘Your wife was getting a little restless.’ He smiles fondly. ‘I told her I’d chase you up.’
‘I’m sorry, the children are going away with their grandparents,’ I tell him, watching as Ava looks up and spots me. I smile mildly, getting one in return. This is so weird, and the weirdness doesn’t seem to be lessening one iota. ‘I had to make sure they had everything they needed.’ I return my attention to the doctor.
‘The children are going away?’ he asks, making it sound like I’m sending them away. It has my hackles rising, though I fight to rein myself in. I don’t need anyone questioning my decision as their father, or as Ava’s husband.
‘They need some time out from this madness,’ I explain, diplomatic and calm, though it takes everything out of me. ‘And if I’m going to help Ava remember us, I need to go back to the beginning of our story.’
‘Your story?’
I laugh under my breath. ‘Yes, our story. Let’s just say it would make a cracking novel.’ My hand sweeps through my hair. ‘We’re not your average couple, doc.’ I sigh, thinking how best to word it so he has a chance of understanding. He’d need to know us to understand. He’d need to have seen what we’ve been through. ‘When I met my wife, it was like an atomic bomb went off in my chest.’ I avoid mentioning that it felt like an atomic bomb went off in my trousers, too. It’s inappropriate. ‘It was like a part of my soul fused with a part of hers, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. It was the most incredible feeling.’ I look back into the room and find Ava’s still staring at me. ‘Unforgettable,’ I whisper, watching her eyes fall to my lips. ‘Which makes this all the more difficult to accept, because how could she forget? Us. The intensity of our relationship and everything we’ve been through together?’ I tear my gaze away from the woman who holds my life in her hands and return my attention to the doctor. ‘I’m scared to fucking death that those memories are gone for ever.’