Total pages in book: 81
Estimated words: 74730 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 374(@200wpm)___ 299(@250wpm)___ 249(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 74730 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 374(@200wpm)___ 299(@250wpm)___ 249(@300wpm)
“I warned you I wasn’t sticking around.”
“Is this how it always goes for you?” I wanted to be sympathetic, but I was having a hard time reconciling his choices. “You find a place, start to feel comfortable, make some connections, and then…what? Cold feet?”
“More likes signs. Something pushing me on my way.” His tone was pragmatic and distant like it was all the universe’s doing and out of his control. “There’s always a sign that it’s time to move on. And when I’ve ignored those signs, I’ve regretted it.”
I made a frustrated noise. I was mad at the foster system that had failed him as a kid and also furious at the people who had hurt him as an adult. However, I was desperate for him to see that I was different. “I’m not your closeted musician guy.”
“I’m well aware of that.” His voice echoed my frustration.
“I’m not going to leave you hanging for years. I came out—”
“I told you not to do it for me.”
“I did it for me.” I wasn’t sure how many times I’d have to remind him he wasn’t responsible for me and my choices. Further, his stated desire to move on and not get attached was at odds with how responsible he acted. He cared, and his inability to see that rankled. “It doesn’t matter if you move on. I’m still gay. I still want to live my truth. No more hiding, including from myself.”
“See? You said it there. It doesn’t matter if I move on.”
“You’re being dense on purpose.” I’d paced away from his chair, but now I returned to glare down at him. “Of course it matters. I want you here.”
“You could come.” Denver’s whisper was so low I had to strain to hear it.
“What?” I dropped to a crouch, both to hear better and to stop looming over him.
“You could come.” He said the words slowly, like he was still mulling each one over. “Your dad didn’t react like you’d hoped. That firefighter is coming back from maternity leave soon, right? Maybe you’d be up for an adventure?”
He sounded so uncertain that I had no clue what he’d do if I actually said yes. But if I’d learned anything over the past few months, it was where my place was.
“All the adventure I need is right here. I’m not going to run away. My dad still has a few months before retirement. Worst comes to worst, I’ll work in a nearby town. Eric and the kids need me.”
“I ne—” Right as I was sure Denver was about to say that he needed me too, he shook his head and scowled. “Never mind. Doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it matters.” I reached up to cup his face, fingers trailing along his fuzzy jaw. “You matter. This matters.”
He remained statue-still even as I pressed a soft kiss to his mouth.
“What are you doing?” he whispered.
“Showing you what matters.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Denver
“Come with me?” Sean held out a hand as he stood.
“Where?” I asked like it mattered. When he kissed me like that, soft and slow and dreamy, I’d go anywhere with him, from a supply closet to the Arctic.
“Carriage house.” He pointed, already tugging me out of the chair. “It’s closest.”
He waited until I was standing to kiss me again, this time more aggressively. And damn, I liked it, liked it when he showed me everything he wanted. He nipped and sucked at my lips and tongue, sending blood rushing straight to my cock. He made everything seem so simple.
I knew better.
“Sean.” I pulled away slightly but kept my hand linked with his. Weak. I was so weak that even my voice was less than convincing. “Sex isn’t going to solve everything.”
“Can’t hurt.” Sean was wrong, of course. It could hurt plenty. Every kiss. Every meal. Every moment was a few feet closer to heartbreak. Yet, I let him lead me down the steps of the deck because disaster might be worth it for another few of those kisses. “And maybe it’ll show I’m worth sticking around for.”
“Of course you’re worth it.” I stopped short, directly in front of the carriage house, which was looking far cheerier these days with clean windows and new exterior lights. “That was never in question.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Sean grinned, but I forced myself not to smile back.
“Other than the fact that you’re worth a heck of a lot more than someone like me?” I held up a hand as he opened his mouth, undoubtedly ready to sing my praises. “And you haven’t exactly looked around. You’ve been out all of three minutes. I’m your first…male partner.”
“You could say boyfriend.” He continued the light tone and cheeky smile before sighing. He opened the carriage house door, ushering me in. “And none of that matters. You seriously think I’d cheat on you? Or get bored and move on?”