Total pages in book: 151
Estimated words: 139803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 699(@200wpm)___ 559(@250wpm)___ 466(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 139803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 699(@200wpm)___ 559(@250wpm)___ 466(@300wpm)
“Why is dancing so important?” Dr. Gresham asked.
“It held me together—prevented this shit,” I told him bluntly, waving my hand over myself. “Without it, I am nothing.”
“I doubt that,” Dr. Gresham told me. “I believe everything happens for a reason. And I believe that no matter how much it hurts right now, you’re going through all of this pain for a reason. You’re being forced to learn how to cope without dance.”
That sounded like utter bullshit.
“But don’t you offer dance therapy?” I asked.
Dr. Gresham nodded. “We do, but you won’t be receiving it,” he informed me. My blood chilled in my veins. No dancing? “I don’t want to put you through dance therapy, and then some day a few years down the road, you sustain an injury that prevents you from dancing any longer. It’ll only throw you right back to where you are now.”
“I need it,” I pleaded, staring at him in horror.
Dr. Gresham sighed. “You’ll never heal if you never truly face your problems, Meghan, and you have a lot to work through.”
I sniffled. “Can I at least go home?” I asked quietly.
Dr. Gresham shook his head. “You won’t be going home anytime soon, Meghan. I would get used to being here if I were you because you’re going to be here for a while.”
I dropped my face into my hands as I sobbed.
* * *
✶ ✶ ✶
* * *
Julian
* * *
Vincent glared at me from across the island. “I don’t even know why I’m telling you this shit, but her doctor thinks she may need to see you sometime in the near future.”
“Doctor?” I demanded angrily. When did a fucking doctor come into this? Vincent had refused to tell me anything, and Axel finally admitted he wouldn’t betray Meghan, which I couldn’t fucking fault him for. But Vince? He was just being a dick. “Vincent, what the fuck is going on with Meghan?”
He sighed and reached up to rub his temples. “I took her to a rehabilitation center.” My eyes widened in shock. “She was snorting coke up her nose and slitting her wrists.”
“What the fuck?!” I exploded. “She’s pregnant, for God’s sake!”
Vincent shook his head. “She miscarried the night you guys broke up,” he told me quietly. My face paled as my heart froze in my chest at his words. “Her roommate called me from Meghan’s phone because you weren’t answering.”
My mind flashed back to the three calls I received that I had ignored and sent to voicemail. And then, I had deleted the voicemails without listening to them because I hadn’t thought I could handle hearing her voice.
Guilt tore at my insides. I should have answered the fucking phone that night. I’d made her a promise that I’d always be there for her, and I broke it at the worst possible time. She’d needed me that night, but I had decided my own feelings were worth more than her and our kid.
“I could hear her crying in the background. I took her to the hospital. By the time I got her there, she was basically losing her fucking mind, and they had to sedate her.”
I dropped onto a bar stool, staring at Vincent in horror. He shoved his hand through his hair as his other hand tightened into a fist on the bar top. “I thought she was holding herself together, but I quickly learned otherwise when her roommate called me and told me she was worried about Meghan. I found her with blood running down her wrist. Coke was stored in her top desk drawer. She was too far gone. She needs real, official help.” He drew in a deep breath. “She’s been in therapy the past two weeks, Julian. Dr. Gresham said the first week was spent with her locked in a room, not eating, and hallucinating her baby’s voice blaming her.”
“Holy fuck.”
“She’s fucked up right now, Julian. She can’t even bring herself to say your name, and her doctor said that she chokes up every time she even has to say the word baby. He doesn’t know how long it’ll be before she begins to make some kind of progress.”
“I ruined her,” I whispered. It was a horrific truth, but it was the truth nonetheless.
Vincent sighed. “I want to hate you, Julian. Trust me, every bit of myself is begging me to hate you, but I can’t, because I know how self-destructive Meghan is when she gets too lost in her head. And she self-destructed like a mother fucker.”
I shook my head. He couldn’t put all of this on her. It wasn’t fair. “I should have never walked away.”
“There’s only so much hurt a man can take,” he grumbled. “I would have walked away from Desiree, so I can’t blame you for walking away from her. What she said to you would be unforgivable in my eyes.”