Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 117363 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117363 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Jeremy looked at his friends. Laila gave Cat’s shoulder a gentle push, and they closed the door behind them on the way out. Jeremy waited a minute before crossing the room to stand at Jean’s side. Jean continued to stare outside like he’d die if he acknowledged Jeremy’s presence. Jeremy looked as well, staring at the daffodils Cat spraypainted on the fence and through them as he collected his thoughts. He weighed all the things he could say, all the things he shouldn’t, and wondered if it was better to just back down and let Jean pull himself together.
“Look at me,” he insisted. When Jean finally turned to face him, Jeremy hooked an arm around his neck to pull him into a fierce hug. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that he hurt you, I’m sorry that you’re still afraid to talk about it, and I’m sorry that you think I’ll never understand. I’m sorry that he tricked you into thinking you deserved it. But I’m not sorry he’s gone. I can’t be.”
After a minute he felt fingers tangle in the front of his shirt. He expected to get shoved away, but maybe Jean was looking for strength, because after a tense minute of silence Jean finally admitted, “Neither am I.”
He said it like he thought they’d be overheard, but that he said it at all gave Jeremy hope. Jeremy held on for a while longer before slowly relaxing his grip. “What do you need from us?”
“To pretend you don’t know,” Jean said.
“Are you protecting him or you?” Jeremy asked.
“Yes,” was the unhesitating response. “The consequences would be catastrophic.”
Jeremy gave it serious consideration as he stepped back out of Jean’s space. Kevin had already sworn him to silence regarding his hand, so keeping Jean’s secrets would only be an extra step from there. It galled him to think he had to swallow this, not for Jean’s sake but because every time he saw Riko honored in the news as a tragic hero he’d want to riot, but it wasn’t his place to interfere with Jean’s trauma or his healing.
“Okay,” Jeremy said at last, hoping he wouldn’t regret this. “We’ll pretend, but you know we know, so if you’re ever ready to talk about it or anything else, remember us. We’re your friends, and we just want what’s best for you.”
“Yes,” Jean said, and then, “I’m going to stay here a little longer.”
Jeremy heard the dismissal in it, but he waited for Jean to let go of his shirt before leaving the room. He closed the door behind himself as quietly as he could and went looking for Cat and Laila. They were tangled together on the couch with twin grim expressions. Jeremy took the open cushion and leaned into Laila for support.
“He did, didn’t he?” Laila asked.
“Jean and Kevin both,” Jeremy said. Cat swore, low and vicious, and Jeremy waited for her to catch her breath before continuing. “But Jean’s still terrified, even with Riko permanently out of the picture. I don’t know if he’s hiding from Coach Moriyama, if Edgar Allan was involved in the cover-up, or what, but it’s important to him that we don’t accuse Riko of anything.”
“You can’t be okay with that,” Cat said. “It’s not fair.”
“It’s not just Jean,” Jeremy reminded her. “Even Kevin is afraid of coming clean. It’s not our call, Cat. If seeking justice jeopardizes their trust and safety, it isn’t worth it.”
They exchanged a long look before Laila nudged Cat with her shoulder. Cat scowled at the far wall but grudgingly said, “I don’t like it, but I’ll keep my mouth shut if you think that’s for the best.”
“I don’t like it either,” Jeremy admitted, “but it’s what he needs from us.”
Laila hummed quietly for a bit before saying, “It would explain a lot, wouldn’t it? Everything from the Foxes’ feud with Riko and the Ravens last year to why Edgar Allan let both Kevin and Jean walk away uncontested during championships. They were buying silence and protecting their precious King.
“I don’t forgive the Ravens,” she added. “Not after what happened his freshman year, and not after the nastiness they heaped upon him this spring. I refuse to think they had no idea what happened. But until he’s willing to share the whole picture, I’ll try not to dig too deep into that wound. But you,” she pointed at Jeremy, “convince him to get rid of those notebooks. He doesn’t need to hold onto that kind of poison.”
“I’ll try,” Jeremy said.
Cat kicked her legs a bit as she stared up at the ceiling. Jeremy couldn’t guess at her thoughts, but her expression said they were unpleasant. At last, she clapped her hands together so hard he was sure her palms went numb, and she launched off the couch.
“I’m going to check on the chicken,” she said.