Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 100277 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 501(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100277 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 501(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
“Star Shine!” Arlo called from his room.
My heart lurched. “Shit.” I wiped at my tears, trying to scrub away the evidence of what had just happened.
“Star Shine!”
“I’m coming!” Shaking my whole body as if to shake off Rafe, I let out a shuddering sigh and hurried into my father’s bedroom.
Arlo sat up in bed, his expression contemplative.
“Hungry?” I asked from the doorway as if my entire body weren’t trembling with adrenaline.
“C’mere.”
Reluctantly I crossed the room and sat in the chair next to his bed. “What’s up?”
His blue eyes searched my face and I noted that he really needed a shave and his goatee trimmed, and I should offer to help him do that. “Your friend leave?”
How much had he heard? “Yeah.”
“You know, I’ve got money saved. I’m thinking I’m going to hire someone to come out and make my meals and stuff for the next few weeks.”
Anger followed my shock at this announcement. “Isn’t Dawn coming back at all?”
Sadness slackened Arlo’s features. “No, it’s not her vibe. I think I’ve been angry about that and taking it out on you. Sorry about that.”
Wonders never ceased. “Why isn’t she here?”
“Dawn hates being around sick people.”
“But you’re not people. You’re the man she’s spent thirty-three years with.”
Instead of responding to that, Arlo twisted his lips. “Your friend doesn’t think much of me, huh?”
“What do you mean?”
“I heard him before he slammed out of here like the fuzz was on his tail.”
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. “He meant nothing by it.”
“I don’t care. You know I’ve never cared what anyone but Dawn thinks of me.”
Not even me.
“He might not be wrong, though.”
“What?” I gawked.
“Your friend. He might not be wrong that you’ve got this all upside down in your mind about, you know . . . relationships and stuff.”
I must have been in some alternate universe, because surely my so-called father wasn’t trying to talk to me about my love life. “What?”
He snorted. “You think you’re Dawn. But you’re not. You might look alike, but that’s where the similarities end. I love Dawn, you know that. But she abandoned me when I needed her and you didn’t do that. Far as I can tell from all your stories of your life in New York, you’re loyal to your friends too. You’re there for them like you’ve been there for me.”
“That’s different,” I murmured, though I was still reeling from his confession that he felt abandoned by Dawn.
“It’s not so different.” He sighed and rested his head on his pillow as he stared up at the ceiling. “All that talk about being commitment-free all these years was just bullshit on my part. I said it because that’s what Dawn wanted to hear. She was the one who couldn’t be monogamous, who wanted our relationship to last but needed other lovers in her life to make it work. I didn’t want to share her.” He sounded suddenly belligerent as his eyes flew to my shocked ones. “I love her. I could have lived happily without ever touching another woman, just Dawn. But I had to show her I was cool with the sharing thing, so I did it.”
Did he realize how incredibly immature that sounded?
“Arlo, are you telling me all these years you’ve wanted to be in a committed relationship with my mother?”
“Don’t call her that.” He winced.
I rolled my eyes. “Well?”
“Yeah, I told you that, didn’t I? I didn’t want to share, but I wanted to keep her, so I did everything she asked, the way she wanted!” His voice rose with his growing anger, and I worried about his heart. “And in the end, I still don’t have her. Look around, Star Shine, where the hell is the woman? Things get heavy and she fucking bolts.”
Compassion mingled with the pain I felt over the scene with Rafe. “I’m sorry.”
“But look who is here.” He pointed at me. “You showed up. Even though you’ve got a life, your work, a man, you showed up for me.”
“He’s not my man.” I glared down at my feet.
“But he could be, if that’s what you want. Look at me, Star Shine.”
I raised my gaze to him.
He gave me a small smile. “I don’t know you all that well.”
What a horribly sad thing for a father to say to his daughter.
“But I do know from what I’ve seen over the years, from what I see of the woman in front of me, that you are not Dawn. You’re not her. You won’t hurt your man like she hurt me.”
* * *
• • •
I stayed one more week with Arlo.
In that time we interviewed a few nurses and we hired a woman named Maggie, who Arlo outrageously flirted with. She dealt with him with steely-eyed professionalism, and I liked her matter-of-fact attitude. I felt confident I was leaving Arlo in excellent hands.