Total pages in book: 36
Estimated words: 32431 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 162(@200wpm)___ 130(@250wpm)___ 108(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 32431 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 162(@200wpm)___ 130(@250wpm)___ 108(@300wpm)
I bawled my eyes out, great wracking sobs tearing a hole in my chest as my mind went numb from the pain. I needed to think, needed to plan, but all I could see was Jonas looking so handsome in his designer tux with Rachel on his arm.
He’d done everything in his power to keep our relationship a secret, never taking any chances that we might be seen somewhere together. I’d hardly been out of the house in three months, and there he was just a week after meeting her, showing her off to the world. Flaunting their love for all to see.
I had to pull over when nausea threatened. Opening the car door I leaned out and dry heaved until I hurt. Oh no, the baby. I slammed the door and made myself breathe calmly. I looked around for an exit ramp. My throat was parched and raw and my brow was clammy. I needed to find a filling station or something so I could grab some water.
It’s amazing that I could think of such things through the pain in my heart. There was a tug of war going on inside of me. One side of my brain wanted to crawl into a hole and die, while the other kept insisting that I keep moving. It was like being torn in two, and the only thing that kept me from curling into myself and drifting away into nothingness, was the innocent child that was growing in my womb.
I found an off ramp up ahead and took it way too fast but there was hardly anyone on the highway. I pulled into the first filling station I came to and walked in almost in a daze. I headed to the back where the refrigerators were and grabbed a few bottles of water before reading the labels of some other stuff to see if it was safe for the baby.
I hate orange juice so that was out but I was pretty sure energy drinks were a no-no. If I’d gone to a doctor I would have a better handle on this, but I’d been putting it off until I found someone I could trust.
I grabbed some chocolate milk, some bananas and an apple and headed to the checkout. I paid for my stuff and ignored the grease ball behind the counter who tried chatting me up. I think if I was armed I would’ve shot him just on principle.
Back in the car I had calmed enough to use the GPS. I might not know where exactly I was going but I had a general idea. Something not too far for a night’s drive but far enough from here. I felt the need to be near the ocean so that’s where I headed. The Carolinas should be nice this time of year.
I used my phone to Google what I was looking for before putting an address into the system. Five hours ought to be far enough for now. Tomorrow or the next day, I’ll think of what to do next.
Since Jonas had been taking care of all of my expenses in the last three and a half months, I had a little something put away. If I cut back a lot, I could find a place wherever I landed until I found a job. My first priority was my child. Making sure that he or she was safe. I didn’t let myself think of what I was leaving behind, I couldn’t.
The pain when I thought of the two of them together was overbearing and I thought it best to just stay numb. I turned the radio on full blast and cried my way through a few songs before I had to pull over to use the restroom. I only had to stop another half a dozen times before I finally reached my destination after one in the morning. I’d called ahead on one of my many stops to make reservations.
The only thing they had available near the water was a one bedroom cottage, which I was more than happy to take. I told myself that I was already feeling better when I heard the waves and the tossing of the ocean with the sea breeze on my face.
I checked in and dragged my butt to the quaint little cottage facing the ocean. I left my bags behind in the car. I’ll get them tomorrow. Right now I was too drained, both physically and emotionally.
I barely took the time to look around the place, just enough to make sure it was safe before locking up, and putting my meager food purchases away. Tomorrow, I’ll see about getting something more substantial than that. If I could ever stand to eat again.
I dropped down on the bed fully clothed barely slipping the house slippers off my feet. Good grief I’d gone into those stores in fuzzy bunny slippers. Who cares?