Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 138274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 691(@200wpm)___ 553(@250wpm)___ 461(@300wpm)
Fireflies. Fireflies?
Even though it was the wrong season, there appeared to be a colony of fireflies that had gathered on the far side of the fire. But that couldn’t be right. They had to be sparks from the flames…
Suddenly, he knew what it was. And who.
“Mother… fucker.”
Across all the flames, just inside the ring of light, the tiny sparks coalesced into a solid figure, a female with hair like moonlight and an aura like the sun itself.
Not tonight, he thought. I do not have the energy.
Still, he began to walk around to her, and she did the same, until they met at the eastern mark of the compass. Rahvyn’s silver hair lay on the shoulders of a red wool coat, and she had proper snow boots on, as well as gloves. As she stared up at him with wariness, he thought of another gunshot wound he’d had in the gut, all those years ago.
When the course of his life had changed forever.
“Are you not cold?” she said.
He didn’t glance down at all his lack of jacket. The thing was hanging on a tree from when he’d warmed up dragging Mickey’s dead weight through the snow. And she could take her concern elsewhere.
“Why are you here?” he asked.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Nate held his arms out and turned in a circle. “Fine, like always. Why’re you asking?”
“Do not play games with me. You know why.”
Zsadist must have told her about the alley scene, he thought as he stayed quiet.
“Nate, I wish you would talk to someone. It does not have to be me.” She looked in the direction of his cabin. “This is not healthy, any of it. The isolation. The anger you have. And you are not eating well—”
“Did you interview my parents before you came here, or are these all your observations?”
“People are worried about you.”
“I can’t do anything about that.”
“Yes, you can.” Her silver eyes went down him. “You can take better care of yourself, and seek some support.”
He just shook his head because he didn’t want to say what was really on his mind.
“That is it?” she prompted into the silence with her formal speech pattern. “You are just going to stand there and—”
“Rahvyn, you have your own shit to worry about. That’s all I’ve got to say.”
The wind changed direction and smoke came between them, obscuring her and, God, he wished she’d finish the job and just ghost the fuck out. He didn’t like to be around her, and even though he hated the memory, he thought back to all those years ago, to when he’d seen her and Lassiter, out in the field behind Luchas House. Nate had brought her a bouquet of flowers. That angel had turned the entire meadow into a sea of blooms.
As she kept staring at him, he wanted to yell at her to get the fuck off his property. Instead, he went with: “Okay, you clearly have something to say to me, not the other way around. So have at it.”
“What are you burning here?”
“Wood.”
“What else?”
“Nothing.”
“Nate.” She looked away. Looked back. “You received a second chance. What are you doing with it, though. This is no life you have.”
Nate glared at the female. Angel. Whatever the hell she was. “I didn’t ask for your magic, and I don’t owe you anything because you chose to bring me back from the dead thirty years ago. If you don’t like the outcome, that’s your problem, not my fault.”
“Life is still a blessing, Nate. Even if you do not have to worry about death anymore. It is still precious even though your own is no longer rare.”
He thought back to the last time the two of them had been alone together. The goodish note they’d left on had soured over the decades because he’d soured on everybody and everything—and that was about so much more than the crush he’d had on Rahvyn, and the way she’d ended up all happy-happy-joy-joy with Lassiter. The reality of Nate’s existence was that all he had was time, and he was suffocated by the countless years ahead of him. Every night he woke up and faced the hours like a bog he had to trudge through, and every day he braced himself for the nightmares that stalked him to the point of madness.
Rinse and repeat.
Until what… the world exploded? Yeah, and then what? If his body was completely destroyed, he’d probably just regenerate, sprouting arms and legs and a head again, and end up floating out in space dying and being reborn for eternity.
Oh, and the shit with Nalla tonight? And what he’d put her through? There were so many reasons to stay away from that female—but the biggest one was the lesson he’d learned that was standing in front of him right now.
He’d been burned once already. He wasn’t looking for a repeat that he could mourn for the rest of time.