Total pages in book: 134
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
Never did I mean them, until I said them to Devon.
Words can’t hurt you, unless you let them. And I knew they were slowly destroying him behind me. I could feel his hurt and pain, the damage that I was causing with the simple, yet pungent delivery of my performance. His feelings ran rapid all around me. I spun in it, hoping to feel comfort, but instead all I could feel was remorse.
I could feel his warmth.
His love.
His kindness.
And his passion for me; only me.
I felt like I was standing, seconds away from being thrown into the death chamber. It was hard to breathe. I couldn't think clearly.
Except, it wasn’t my execution.
It was Devon’s.
I was the slaughterer.
I held his whole world in the palm of my hand, and I knew it. It’s where his heart was; I owned that, too. I closed my eyes, and spoke with conviction, about to push him into the flames and never see him again.
“How much do you want to fuck me?” I panted, heavily breathing every word. “Do you want me to swallow your come?” I viscously spewed into the phone, knowing that he could hear everything. “Do you have any idea how hard you make me come? How good it feels when you’re deep inside me?” I stopped, not being able to carry on, biting my cheek till I tasted blood.
I could not cry.
I could not show weakness.
I could not show emotion, or how I truly felt.
It was the right thing to do.
I needed to free him.
I was not my father.
“I’m going to fuck you all night… so that I can’t walk tomorrow, would you like that?” I baited.
“You have no idea—” My cellphone was roughly ripped out of my hands, and thrown against the wall. It shattered into pieces.
Exactly how my heart was about to.
I would never expect what would happen next. Not in a million years.
He crudely pulled me away from the window, before the final pieces of my cellphone splattered all over my hardwood floors. He shoved me up against the wall; my back hit it with a thud, knocking all the air from my lungs.
“What the fuck?” I screamed out, profusely trying to catch my breath. He didn’t give me a chance to recover, or even acknowledge what the hell was happening, before he came at me. I tried to fight him off, but he was stronger than I was. He wasn’t being gentle or sweet, not the Devon that I knew and loved. I didn’t know this man who was aggressively manhandling me to the point of leaving bruises.
“Devon, calm down,” I begged, being able to step toward him, but he didn’t falter, he pushed me up against the wall. His hands were firmly placed over my heart. This time my head had collided with the wall, and I was seeing stars.
“Shhh…” he locked my hands above my head, cutting off my circulation. He grabbed my throat, placing my head securely against the wall… the same place my skull had knocked.
My eyes swiftly opened when I felt his hold around my windpipe, leaving me with barely any air. It took a few more seconds for my eyes to register his face.
That’s when I noticed it.
Devon wasn’t standing in front of me.
A glimpse of his father was.
<>D<>
“And what exactly is that, Bambi? Huh? Is it the fact that we love each other? Is that the problem?” I argued, having enough of the bullshit and lies.
Her jaw dropped and her eyes widened. Completely caught off guard with what I shared, and called her out on. Her cellphone rang again, and her eyes found the sound, but they quickly made their way back to me when it stopped ringing.
“I don’t love you, Devon,” she boldfaced lied. “I’m sorry… I care deeply about you, but I don’t love you.”
I watched her…
I watched her every move.
From her glazed over eyes that wanted to cry.
To the sound of her voice that she prayed wouldn’t break apart.
The way she pressed her fingernails into her hand to keep herself together.
And most importantly, the sounds of her breathing and heart that I heard even with the distance between us.
She knew that I could read her like a goddamn book, and that’s when she reached over to grab her cellphone that was ringing again.
“Hey there, gorgeous,” I heard the voice say on the other end.
“Hi,” she lured, not looking at me, but at the floor instead.
“I want to play… do you want to play?” he inquired, almost knocking me on my ass.
The same words she has said to me countless times.
The same phrase she has said to men countless times.
She stepped out of her kitchen and strode over to her living room. I didn’t step away from the door. I was glued to the floor that felt like it was caving beneath me.