Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 129323 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 647(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129323 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 647(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
You could always summon Cassidy…
See, there I go again. No. Nope. Not going there.
That’s something I can’t do. Waking her up in the middle of the night to fuck the insomnia out of me is more than crossing a line.
I lean forward, elbows on my knees and head in my hands, trying to refrain from slipping into my tics. Something to give me a semblance of control.
Control is what I’m grasping for at the moment. So many things are working against me, and it’s making everything worse.
You need to practice restraint.
Apparently, in all ways.
“What are you doing?”
My head snaps up to find Cassidy, sleepy-eyed and hair swept over one shoulder, staring down at me with concern.
I hate that look.
I don’t need anyone’s concern.
My compulsions won’t throw me over the edge and cause me to do something irrational.
They’re fucking frustrating and annoying as hell but harmless.
I tear my eyes away from hers and do a slow perusal of her body. She’s wearing a pair of short floral shorts that hang mid-thigh and a white T-shirt. She isn’t wearing a bra, which is evident by her hard nipples poking through the thin fabric.
Fuck.
I snap my head away, trying to avoid needing her that way.
“I’m fine. Go back to bed.”
“Clearly, you’re not,” she says in a tone that has me looking back at her.
She crosses her arms over her chest, blinking rapidly. Her cheek is sucked in as she appears to contemplate something.
“Seriously, Cassidy. It’s all good. I couldn’t sleep. Nothing more.”
“Do you need—”
“Whatever I need, I’m not going to get. I just want to sleep.”
“Come with me,” she says, walking toward the kitchen and pointing at a chair, directing me to take a seat. I lift a brow. “Just do it.” She offers a smile.
That gets me to do as instructed. Mostly out of curiosity. What is this woman up to?
She goes about opening the refrigerator and pulling out a gallon of milk. She lifts onto her toes, grabbing a mug from the cupboard.
The white tee lifts, and a patch of creamy skin peeks out. My dick hardens automatically, and the urge to ask her what she was about to offer before I so rudely cut her off slams over me. I had no choice. If she mentioned anything sexual, I wouldn’t be strong enough to say no.
I close my eyes and count backward from ten, willing my overactive libido to sit down.
When I finally have things under control, I take one last deep breath and open my eyes. Cassidy places the mug of milk into the microwave, and my body tenses.
I watch, transfixed.
Warm milk.
When was the last time I had warm milk?
Years ago.
“Sometimes, when I’d feel stressed, my mom would make me hot milk. It always made me feel better. Do you want me to make you some?”
I look at her, surprised by her offer. “You don’t have to do that. I’ll be fine.”
“No, really. It’s no trouble at all. I want to help.”
What are the fucking chances?
She places the piping hot mug down in front of me, and I just stare at it.
“Aiden…drink up. It’ll help.” She smiles warmly, but it melts from her face when she sees my reaction. “What?” she asks, nose scrunching.
I lift my head, eyes narrowed. “Why did you make this?”
“The milk?” she asks, cocking her head. “Doesn’t everyone drink warm milk when they can’t sleep?”
I’ve only ever known one person who did this. Not that I’ll admit that to her.
Then again, how many people have I allowed myself to get close enough to, that I’d know something like this about them?
Not many.
Okay…none.
My shoulders relax, and I take a deep breath, lifting the cup to my mouth and taking a sip. My eyes close with a sigh.
That one sip assaults my senses, causing memories to come flooding back. The pain that I felt the moment I realized my dreams were beyond my grasp.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” I don’t bother to look up. I don’t want her to see me like this.
I sigh. “Nothing you can help with.”
“Try me.”
“I missed the deadline to apply to college. She made me miss it.” I bury my head in my hands. My body shakes with uncontrolled emotion. I need to control it. I need to—
I shake my head, pushing my past away to where it belongs.
“Thank you, Cassidy.”
She smiles wide, and my breath hitches at the sight. “You’re welcome.”
Our gazes lock, and it’s like we’re in some sort of strange bubble. It’s disarming.
It’s not appropriate.
I pull my gaze away, breaking the connection.
I’m vaguely aware of Cassidy placing the milk back into the refrigerator and leaning over the counter, getting a little too close.
“Care to talk about what’s on your mind?”
“No.”
I don’t bother elaborating. I don’t need her to be my shrink. I need her to care for my needs in other ways. The milk was a surprising move, something I didn’t know I needed, but I don’t need any more from her tonight.