Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 75642 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75642 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 378(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 252(@300wpm)
I know I should give him the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time, turning a blind eye to all the possibilities seems immature.
He doesn’t try to hold me against him when I pull back. As ready as I was to just pull my pajama bottoms down for this man a minute ago, I still feel a little disappointed in the way his eyes lock on my nipples pressing against my sleep shirt instead of looking me in the eye.
Maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe I want some type of fairytale that doesn’t exist. Him staring at my breasts doesn’t make him a bad guy. Maybe I should find it flattering. I imagine a lot of women would.
I frown as I sit on the edge of the bed and look at Sutton for a quick second before scrubbing my hands over my face.
He makes me feel like I’m losing my mind. Only minutes ago, I was completely lost in him. There’s a very real chance he’d be inside of me right now if Sutton hadn’t woken up. With her and the boys in this same room, that’s a problem. He makes me forget the important things, and losing focus right now isn’t something I should do.
“We should shower,” he whispers as he positions himself closer, his lips once again on my neck.
I have no hope of controlling the wave of cold chills that cover my body.
I lick at my dry lips as I stand, needing a little distance.
When I look back over my shoulder, I see his eyes locked on my ass.
If I don’t get my libido under control, I know we’re going to end up naked together. I want that as much as he clearly does, but I’m not the same girl who knocked on his door that night. A quick roll between the sheets isn’t all I’m after. I need more than just physical relief right now. If the other things aren’t part of the consideration, then I’d much rather keep a few degrees of separation between us.
“I showered last night,” I tell him as I scoop Sutton up from her crib before carrying her into the bathroom with me.
When I was a girl, I went to summer camp once. One of the women at Mom’s church talked her into letting us go. Janet was in a different part of the camp because she was older, and it was my very first taste of freedom.
The kitchen this morning in the Cerberus clubhouse is very reminiscent of that experience. People are bustling all over the place, each with a different task, all with smiles on their faces.
The coffee machine on the counter is an industrial size and the very first thing most people head to when they enter the room.
“You got too much, didn’t you?” I ask Jace as he stares down at his plate of food.
He shakes his head. “I just don’t know where to start.”
Several of the guys sitting at a nearby table chuckle.
“You’ll have to work out with us in the gym later,” one of the guys says. I understand now why Kincaid mentioned them wearing those vests with their names on them yesterday because I have no clue what his name is now that he’s in the kitchen in nothing but sweats and a thin t-shirt. “Can’t have you getting soggy in the middle.”
“You’ll have to work these off too,” Oracle, one of the guys I do recognize, says as he drops off another plate in front of each boy.
“What’s that?” Luca asks, pointing to the design on the pancake.
“It’s a smiley face,” Oracle answers, tilting his head a little.
Luca tilts his head too but the child still looks confused.
“Now that you mention it,” Oracle says. “Let’s call it a constellation.”
“I don’t know what that is but it tastes delicious,” Luca says, jamming a bite of chocolate chip pancakes into his mouth.
Jace pulls his napkin from the table and wipes at Luca’s cheek, whispering something so softly to him that I can’t hear it over the din in the room.
Anger at my sister flares inside of me at the sight. It isn’t Jace’s job to look after Luca the way he’s been doing. I don’t know if it was Janet’s expectation or if it’s learned behavior.
It hits me that maybe she taught Jace to act this way so Luca always had someone, in case, for some reason, she couldn’t be there for her children.
Sadness washes over me.
It doesn’t matter now how they got involved with Keres and the drugs. I know it was done either out of necessity, because they saw no other way, or they were forced into it. Neither Janet nor Carlen were the types of people who would ever endanger their children if they could help it. I need to stop being mad at them for just trying to survive. Something they failed at. What I won’t do is fail their children.