Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 80304 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 402(@200wpm)___ 321(@250wpm)___ 268(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80304 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 402(@200wpm)___ 321(@250wpm)___ 268(@300wpm)
How is it that he knew what I needed before I did? That’s something to dive into another day. Right now, I’m surrounded by a wonderful family who is acting as if I’m a part of them. That I belong here, and that is something that I’m grateful for.
CHAPTER
NINETEEN
Rushton
This day isn’t at all what I expected it to be.
It’s more.
I wanted her here. The thought of her being alone today tore me up inside. What I didn’t know was how it would make me feel seeing her fitting in so well with my family. I mean, I knew she got along well with my sisters-in-law and even my mom, but seeing her here, as if she’s always been a part of us, that shit hits me deep in my chest.
“You know it takes more than staring at her to get her pregnant.” Brooks laughs.
“What?” I tear my gaze away to look at him.
“The way you’re looking at your girl holding my daughter is obscene.”
“Fuck off,” I grumble. He’s not wrong, though. How can I not think about what it would be like if that was our baby she was holding? This falling shit is a lot to take on. Sure, I’ve always envied what my older brothers have been able to find with their wives, but never have I pictured a woman in my life and thought about how it would be to have a family with her.
“You’re thinking about it.” He smirks.
“So what if I am?” I counter. He and I are sitting in the corner of the living room on our own. The twins, Archer, and Ryder are all in the basement playing pool. Orrin, Deacon, Sterling, and Declan are watching the game with Dad, and the ladies, including my mom, are fussing over the kids. I slipped off in the corner to observe, and of course, my brother would catch on and call me out on my not-so-covert operation. At least it’s just the two of us in this conversation. Not that he’s not going to share with my brothers. That’s just what we do. We meddle in each other’s lives, and although it can annoy me, I wouldn’t change it. I wouldn’t want the alternative.
My eyes go back to Crosby. My hand goes to my chest to try and rub the ache away of what she’s lived through. The lack of love and affection she’s received in her life makes me want to smother her with it, but I know that’s pushing her too far. I sense that I might be wearing her down. Proving to her that I’m in this for the long haul, but she still needs time.
The time I’m going to give her even if it kills me.
“You might want to tell her your plans,” Brooks jokes.
“She knows. Well, I mean not that I can see her with our kids. I’m trying to get her to stop fighting our connection, not send her running for the hills.”
Brooks shrugs. “I don’t hold back. Not anymore. I almost lost Palmer over that shit. I speak what’s on my mind regardless. Honesty. Always.”
“I’ve been honest with her.”
“You’ve told her you want to make babies with her?” He raises his eyebrow in question.
“I didn’t know that I did until about a minute before you walked up.”
He bursts out laughing, which has everyone looking our way.
My eyes meet Crosby’s, and she smiles softly before turning her attention back to whatever it is that Ramsey is saying while she remains holding Remi in her arms.
“You know, when you boys were little, if any number of you slipped off and got quiet, that’s when your mother and I knew to worry. The quiet is when the mischief happens.” Dad laughs, joining us. “What are you two up to?” he asks us.
“This is all you, little brother.” Brooks claps me on the shoulder and takes Dad’s spot on the couch, joining the others to watch the game.
“What’s on your mind, Rush?”
“Just enjoying the day,” I tell him.
“You know I raised you, right?” He chuckles. The deep sound is comforting.
“Yeah,” I agree. I know he can see through our bullshit. I don’t even know why I tried.
“Let’s hear it. I’m pretty good at this, you know. You should ask your brothers. The ones that are married anyway.” He grins. “That includes Sterling.”
I laugh at that because we all know Sterling sees no one but Alyssa. “How much time you got, old man?” I tease.
“As much as you need.”
I nod. I should have expected that too. My parents have been there for us every step, good times and bad, no judgment. “She’s scared.”
“Does she have a reason to be?”
“Not of me, of what we could be.”
“Like I said. Should she be?”
“No.”
He nods. “Her past?” he asks.
“Yeah.” I go on to tell him a little of her background, knowing she’s not going to mind. I don’t tell him more than she told Maverick this morning on her front porch. “She’s scared that she’s not going to have her contract renewed, and she’s going to have to leave town.”