Total pages in book: 119
Estimated words: 114284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 571(@200wpm)___ 457(@250wpm)___ 381(@300wpm)
That was…interesting. No doubt, Walker had planned for it, then. He of all people would know what pain did to Macklin.
Lane scooted closer to me and kissed my neck. “Are we gonna play together tonight?”
I withheld my smile and drained my drink.
“You did tell me to go through my prep routine,” he pointed out. “And Master McKenna gave Macklin an enema this morning.”
Did he, now?
I tilted my face toward him and kissed him quickly. “I guess you’ll have to wait and see.”
It was a terribly kept secret. The boys had no reason to believe we wouldn’t play.
Walker was the mastermind behind tonight’s fun. He’d come out here early to reserve one of the two hot tubs on the patio, and given that they hadn’t been used in a long time, we were talking new water and hours for it to heat up.
Lane stayed glued to my side and abandoned his drink to get handsy. “We have to play, Daddy… Macklin and I wanna see you and Walker together.”
I chuckled under my breath and left my glass on the side table.
“On that note…” He cleared his throat and hiked a leg over my lap. “Do, um, do you think you and Walker will fall in love?”
Oh. Shit, that seemed… That question came out of nowhere. Except, maybe Lane had thought about it for a while.
“I know it’s soon.”
Very, very, very soon, I wanted to say. But given the apprehensive look in his eyes, it was a conversation that needed to be had now. And I wasn’t sure Lane and I were on the same page here.
“What I can tell you, is that you will always be my primary.” I brought his hands to mine and kissed his knuckles. “Now—I want you to hear me out. The way I feel about you so early in the game, how insanely fuckin’ possessive I am, not to mention protective of what we’ve just started…? I know where you and I are headed. I can already feel it.”
He smiled a little but was probably too nervous to relax fully.
“The thing is,” I continued carefully, “I watched you and Macklin a lot in Florida, darlin’. I know everything’s been up in the air, and Walker came back into Macklin’s life—but your connection… You and Macklin share something that goes beyond merely carin’ for each other. You use the word adore as if it’s allowed you to get invested without being too tangled up in commitment.”
Now he was plain confused, and I couldn’t blame him. Walker and I had talked about this. We were in agreement. We had to see how our primary relationships let the secondary relationships evolve, because we believed they would.
“But now y’all have real commitment,” I said. “More than that, with you fully committed to me—and Macklin fully committed to Walker—he and I believe, and hope, that you boys can relax. Find confidence in our structure and let yourselves explore if there’s more.”
He knitted his brows together. “What’re you saying, exactly?”
“I’m sayin’—” I paused to gather my thoughts. Fucking hell, I wasn’t precisely an expert in this area. I didn’t have many relationships whatsoever in my baggage. Casual or serious. But maybe it was the hedonist in me who was at ease enough to say, let’s just go for it. I believed the four of us were genuine and serious enough to manage. We were equally protective of the commitments we put first, all while we really wanted the four of us as a unit to build something together.
I took a breath and nodded to myself. That was the way to go. “I’m sayin’, now that you and Macklin don’t have to hide behind the bullshit of no strings attached, maybe y’all will discover that your feelings run a bit deeper than you’ve allowed for in the past.” I lifted his chin when he tried to look down. “It would be totally okay with me, baby. We can love someone a hundred different ways—and Walker and I… All we’re saying is, we don’t want you boys to keep some wall up. That’s for relationship structure, not emotions.”
Understanding seemed to dawn on him, and the affection flooding his eyes was unmistakable—not to mention a relief to see.
“I guess this is one of those questions I ask too early,” he replied with a sheepish grin. I wasn’t sure I knew what he meant by that. Did he have other questions? “I mean, it’s kinda too soon to tell where our feelings will go, at least for me. I don’t know just how deep my attachment for Mack goes yet.”
“And I don’t know how deeply mine will go for Walker.” I smiled and touched his cheek. “But we can talk about it however often you want, if only to touch base. As long as I have you by my side, I don’t think there’s much we can’t handle.”