Total pages in book: 147
Estimated words: 137135 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 137135 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 686(@200wpm)___ 549(@250wpm)___ 457(@300wpm)
Her message comes at the same time mine sends, and then her reply not long after.
Sienna:
FML it just dawned on me I'm going to have to actually speak to you… and look at you… IN PERSON, Sir. My whole body is literally vibrating.
No problem, Sir lol
In order to learn how to beat her anxiety, she first has to face it in all it’s overwhelming glory. You don’t beat cancer by only treating a tiny piece of it. No, you have to get rid of it entirely, as much as you can all at once, even taking extra just in case. And then whatever you couldn’t quite reach, you hit it with all the ammunition you have as a fallback. Otherwise, that shit will just spread and keep on coming back.
RomanticSadist:
Sit and let your imagination—fantasies and fears, both—run wild.
Sienna:
I'm very, very, very good at that, Sir.
I know, little one. And I can’t wait to teach you all the pleasures that wild imagination can conjure.
RomanticSadist:
Are you beginning to think you're not the only word wizard? 😉
I’ve been told throughout my life I have a way with words. I just shrugged it off as a kid, not understanding what they meant, because I just spoke and wrote the words the way they popped into my head. It’s not like I was taking the time to make my speech poetic or witty on purpose. But then when I got older, seeing the effect the way I talk had on women, I learned to harness it. I admit I went through a period of time I used my power for evil, getting things I wanted with coercion or by spinning questions and answers in a way that made others believe it was all their idea. But after becoming a part of the BDSM community, I hung up that hat and chose to only use that power for good—or at least in a way that wouldn’t hurt anyone if they realized my special abilities.
Sienna:
I knew that from “go,” Sir. It's why you weren't blocked after message #2.
It's both awesome and terrifying meeting someone who's actually smarter than me, Sir.
I pull my lips between my teeth, biting down to keep from laughing out loud. I can’t count the number of times I’ve thought to myself—learning early on that saying it aloud was frowned upon by societal norms—how frustrating it is that I’m always surrounded by idiots. Not being conceited, just a fact. My IQ is almost always the highest in the room, and combined with my people-reading skills, it’s probably a good thing I was born on the spectrum. Otherwise, I would’ve probably ended up as a serial killer instead of taking the opposite route as a healer. I’m at just a far enough distance from “normal” people’s emotions to think on the spot and make split-second decisions without feelings being involved, but not so far that I don’t truly feel emotions. A move in either direction would’ve been dangerous for everyone. All sorts of things in my past could’ve made me snap, and I would’ve had the intelligence and skillset to never be caught. But since I had that tiny “flaw” in my brain, it acted as a safety buffer, a filter that kept me at a safe distance from feeling things too intensely.
In Sienna’s case, she is incredibly intelligent. But instead of having my ability to read people by watching them and listening to their words, she’s opposite. She feels “too deeply.” Meaning she’s an empath and can know a person by feeling their emotions. I suspect that’s where most of her anxiety comes from without her even realizing it. She’s an introvert, so while she wants to be surrounded by friends and people, she inadvertently takes in all the chaos when a big group gets together, and it drains her.
She’s never asked what I do for a living, and I wouldn’t be able to give her the whole truth without it leading to her discovering my identity. So I go with one of my favorite quotes.
RomanticSadist:
Thank you for the compliment. But there are different kinds of intelligence. The mechanic is no less intelligent than the doctor. They just know different skills.
Everyone is a master of something.
Sienna:
Does that mean I'm a master of writing Masters, Sir? hehe
Her go-to when she’s overwhelmed—making jokes.
RomanticSadist:
Possibly, little one.
An honest answer, not one to feed the ego. I’ve never read her books, so I wouldn’t know how accurately or lyrically she writes a Dominant’s story.
Sienna:
OMG I'm so ridiculous, Sir. WTF. Men don't make me nervous, Sir. I can walk up to literally ANYONE and talk their ear off. But I'm about to have a freaking heart attack thinking about just *looking* at you in person, Sir.
What she doesn’t say is men don’t make her nervous because she’s not normally attracted to them, to anyone. She’s said it before. The fact that she’s this nervous goes to show just how attracted to me the little sub is.