Total pages in book: 42
Estimated words: 39136 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 196(@200wpm)___ 157(@250wpm)___ 130(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 39136 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 196(@200wpm)___ 157(@250wpm)___ 130(@300wpm)
Hunkering down with Morgan was one of my favorite things in the world. That asshat didn’t know what he was missing.
2
Morgan
I was in the shower, trying to jerk off so I didn’t pop a boner in front of Elliot. I’d totally wanted to get laid tonight, and if he was going to cuddle me in bed, I didn’t want my dick to poke him. Not that it hadn’t happened before. Morning wood and all that. And once after watching some gay anime together, not realizing how erotic it would be. And okay, the other time, in our teens, when we practiced kissing, hoping we wouldn’t completely suck when the time came for one of us to get some real experience with a guy.
It wasn’t a hardship. Elliot was gorgeous, with his stylish crew cut and tall, athletic frame. But our friendship superseded all that. We wanted to be a support for each other and not mess it all up. Actually, we’d even dissolved into laughter by the end of our kissing practice because we were already solidly in the friend zone, and it felt too weird.
But also good, if I was being honest. At that point, though, kissing anyone would’ve felt pretty damned good.
I fisted my cock while gripping the shower handle Elliot had installed for me as soon as I’d mentioned almost slipping in the tub. He was the best kind of guy and would undoubtedly take good care of whoever he ended up with in life.
I closed my eyes and thought of something that would turn me on enough to shoot off so I could end this shower, which seemed to be taking forever. Maybe if I focused on the nice dick pic I was sent the other day. That guy didn’t pan out either. Or maybe baseball pants. Which only made me think of Elliot again and how disappointed he was after his stupid skateboard injury in high school. He missed playing, so he threw himself into working out and classes instead. He would definitely become the best physical therapist on the planet.
If all went well, I’d be graduating with my computer science degree and hopefully getting my own app operational—the details of which I hadn’t revealed to Elliot yet. I wanted to create my own socializing app that was more inclusive and intersectional. One that didn’t make people feel terrible when they didn’t fit into the right box. I’d gotten the idea in my computer architecture class when we’d broken into groups to create mock programs and had gotten into a discussion about cringey dating incidents. I could even call my own hookup experiences a test of sorts. The queer community had its share of prejudices and issues, something that had always baffled me. How you could be part of an alienated portion of society yet still exclude other struggling groups.
Like the disabled community. Don’t get me wrong, I had my fair share of sex with guys, but it wasn’t always easy. For one, I usually needed extra time—unless it was an upright quickie that didn’t involve me getting fully undressed.
My diagnosis had been a shock not only to me but to my parents as well. And it only highlighted my physical and social challenges. Thank God, Elliot always came through for me in the friend department. If one more person told me to stay strong and that they were rooting for me, my jaw would become permanently locked in clench mode. But believe me, I got it, and I’d made my own blunders before my diagnosis. In general, able-bodied people didn’t know how to act around someone like me. But we were all human. I just happened to have a disability along with other struggles to work through, like putting on leg braces so I could get through my day without falling on my ass. And it wasn’t going to get better, so I was forced to accept it, which actually made me stronger. At least mentally. But I couldn’t help squirming when people told me how brave I was. The sentiment felt…hollow, even if they meant well.
What I wanted was someone who didn’t blink at my leg braces or at my unsteady gait when I took them off. Was that sexy? Guess not. But I wasn’t going to let any dude make me feel less than.
My kind of guy was out there, even if I hadn’t found him yet. And that was okay because I had a full life to keep me busy. And a best friend waiting for me.
Thankfully, my thoughts threading off in different directions put a damper on my libido, so I turned off the water and carefully stepped out to dry myself off. I cursed when I lost my balance and had to hold on to the sink. I was feeling vulnerable tonight, likely because I’d let that hookup’s reaction get to me.