Total pages in book: 40
Estimated words: 36387 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 182(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 121(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 36387 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 182(@200wpm)___ 146(@250wpm)___ 121(@300wpm)
It was like a bucket of ice being dumped over my head once reality set in. Of course there’s no way he’s ever going to want anything real with me, why would he? When he could have the best the town has to offer?
I wiped furiously at the threatening tears and shored up my resolve. It’s not the first time I’ve felt this heartache. Though in the past it’s been for very different reasons, but I know how to get over it.
My mind shied away from the idea, but I knew I had to do it, for self preservation at least. Over my first morning cup of coffee I was still formulating my exit plan even as a little voice in my head told me I should leave it alone and see where it goes.
Where it ends is with him telling me it was fun while it lasted but he needed to move on. Isn’t that what they say he does? He might know how to do that and still live right next door, but I’m not made that way.
Fine, it’s settled then. I thought maybe I should maybe call up the girls, but decided against it. The less people who knows about my mistake the better.
So it was that a few hours later I made my way to his door. Of course I didn’t have the heart to tell him, didn’t have that much courage, so I wrote it on a card and packed a plate of Xmas cookies I’d made on the fly.
“Hey you…” He greeted me with a smile, looking like he’d just rolled out of bed and my traitorous body perked right up. I held the plate out to him before turning and scurrying away like the coward that I am.
For the next two hours I cowered in my kitchen waiting for the doorbell to ring. Or for him to break it down. Ooh, caveman, he fits the bill. My thoughts were making me hot once I started imagining where things could go after her breaks down the door, but I fought them.
What? Hadn’t he eaten the cookies? Who doesn’t read the card at least? I made myself nuts all day until I realized that he was probably relieved that I’d taken the initiative and now that he’d gotten what he wanted, he had no reason to approach me again.
I tore myself up, one minute fearing that he hadn’t as yet read the card and I’d have to go through this again, and the next worrying that he’d read it and just didn’t care. I don’t know which feeling was worst.
I got my answer later that day when I found the plate on my doorstep, empty, no note. I looked over at his house but he didn’t seem to be home. Somehow I can always tell whether he’s in there or not. Even though he parks in the garage.
I felt out of sorts all the rest of that day and knew I was in deep trouble when I wasn’t even interested in baking. I kept going to the window to catch a glimpse of him, but nothing.
I argued back and forth with myself. Maybe I should’ve waited and see where things went. But each time I make that argument I come back to the same thing. There’s no way it would work between us. He’s too… and I’m too… And the merry-go-round would start all over again.
By early evening and I still hadn’t heard from him, I convinced myself that he had indeed read the card and was probably out celebrating the fact that I’d made things so easy for him. The jerk!
He couldn’t even wait one day. Now I felt like baking. Now I needed to do something with my hands before I go next door and strangle that snake in his sleep later.
I banged around the kitchen in the shop and before you know it I had three pies, two cakes and a batch of cupcakes going. I was so engrossed in what I was doing, I didn’t hear him come in.
Lucky for me he came when he did and hadn’t shown up any of the times I’d been cussing his ass out. I only realized he was there when I felt his arms go around me from behind.
I knew it was him because of his smell, it was a scent all his own. “Why didn’t you lock the door if you were going to be back here by yourself?” He ran his nose along my neck to my ear before I felt his teeth there.
I held onto the edge of the counter as my knees went weak. “What’re you doing here? Didn’t you read my note?” His hands came up to my breasts and I almost lost my train of thought.
“I read it.” That’s all he said before turning me around in his arms to face him. I couldn’t read him well enough to tell what he was thinking before he lowered his head to mine.