Total pages in book: 138
Estimated words: 130307 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 652(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 130307 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 652(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Hell — I had already fallen. Hard. A face-planting, knee-skinning type of fall that left you bruised and bloody for life.
I thought putting distance between us was the right thing to do. The Reddit advice flew in faster than I could read it before I deleted everything, but it all echoed the same sentiment — pull away. Go ghost. Don’t talk to him, don’t confess feelings, and definitely don’t get naked again, not until you pull your shit together.
His words from yesterday floated through me.
I miss her, I do, but I miss you more.
And then he’d kissed me.
And last night, that wasn’t a lesson. That wasn’t fucking.
That was making love.
That was sensual, slow, every move intentional.
I frowned, blinking rapidly and trying to keep up with my mind as it spiraled.
Because he was already gone this morning.
I tiptoed down the stairs, and when I heard rustling in the kitchen and the sound of voices, I breathed with relief again. He probably just got up to check on Ava. He was probably in the kitchen with Chef now, waiting for me.
What would he do when he saw me, I wondered?
Would we smile and wink and keep our secrets like always?
Would he pull me into him, kiss me in front of Chef, claim me for more than just the nanny he fucks occasionally?
Did I… want that, too?
That last question was both the easiest and the most difficult to answer. My heart, my soul responded with a resounding yes. I wanted him. God, I wanted him more than anything.
And yet there was a loud voice in my head, maybe two of them, reminding me of all the reasons it was stupid to even admit that to myself, let alone out loud.
I tried to school my features as I rounded into the kitchen, but when I stumbled upon Chef and Uncle Mitch, my steps faltered.
Uncle Mitch was in the kitchen with Arushi, laughing as they cracked eggs together over a mixing bowl. He pretended like he was going to lick his fingers and she swatted his hand away, shaking her head and calling him stupid, but with eyes that said she thought he was anything but.
It felt like a private moment, but when Chef saw me enter, she didn’t act surprised. She simply smiled wider as she rinsed her hand and dried them on her apron.
“Good morning, sunshine,” she said. “How’s our girl doing?”
I blinked, looking around like Will would manifest out of thin air. “Still sleeping,” I managed. “I’ll wake her here in a bit.”
“It’s okay, might as well let her sleep. She didn’t wake up when Will checked on her earlier, either. Poor thing is probably beat,” Uncle Mitch said, crossing the kitchen to where I stood after he’d washed his own hands. He pulled me into a hug that I felt rather stiff inside before he framed my arms in his large hands.
He looked so much like Will, it made my chest hurt.
“How are you doing? Must have been quite a scare.”
“I’m okay,” I said, the lie coming a bit too easily.
He gave me a look like he knew better. “Well, Will called me this morning, asked if I’d come spend the day with Ava. He thought it might help her feel better to have this old clown around while he was at work.” He winked. “Besides, he was pretty adamant that you take the day off.”
I blinked. “Oh.”
“He said you really stepped up to save the day yesterday,” Chef chimed in.
And that was the crack that broke the dam inside of me.
He just… left.
He left without a word.
He left without talking about what happened last night, about what this meant, about what the hell we were now.
Which left me feeling like I’d overanalyzed it all, like it didn’t matter.
Fuck the rules, he’d said. But maybe he meant just for the night.
Need you, he’d whispered. But maybe he just needed the release.
I’d read too far into it already, making a fool of myself in the span of twelve hours.
Mom would be so disappointed. Grandma would suck her teeth and shake her head.
I was a simpering idiot.
My eyes flooded so quickly I couldn’t do a damn thing to stop the tears before they were streaming down my cheeks. I swiped them away as quickly as they came, but it was too late.
Mitch and Arushi shared a concerned look, and then Chef was wiping her hands again, hooking me by the arm and tugging me out into the back yard. She barked some orders for Mitch to take over in the kitchen, and then we were outside and she was hugging me in the shade near the pool.
“Okay. This is not about Ava,” she said, squeezing me tight as more tears fell. “What’s going on?”
I sniffed as I pulled back, shaking my head, emotion clogging my throat and making it impossible to speak. But Chef Patel wasn’t taking no for an answer. She stood there with me, letting me cry, letting me feel it all while she rubbed my arms and waited.