Total pages in book: 115
Estimated words: 107763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 107763 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
“Fear,” she said very softly, the conviction in her face fading. “My elder sister, Aphrodite, is as divine as her name; there is nothing beyond her capabilities. On top of that she’s the most beautiful of us Du Bell girls. If she were the youngest, it would not matter as much, but because she was the first girl, she set the standard. So, when I fail at my walk or curtsy, if I am unsuccessful in my attempts to hold charming conversation, it looks even worse next to her. Everything comes naturally to her…while I, not wishing to be mocked or ridiculed in her shadow, had to practice. Over and over and over again I practiced everything to be the very best lady. And when I mastered something and I rushed out to show society or my own family—everyone shrugged. Days, weeks, years of practice, and in the end they all looked at me and said, good. That was it. That was all. Because Aphrodite had long since accomplished it already. I was just good.”
She wasn’t looking at me any longer, her eyes transfixed in sorrowful thought.
“My father believes strength and fear are the only ways to rule a nation and family. My eldest brother, Frederick, the heir, was born premature, and thus has been sickly all his life. Growing up, my cousin Edmund and I were told by my mother to never overshadow him. We were instructed to always lose to him and make sure he’d be seen in a good light by our father. This caused Edmund to resent him. He purposely made Frederick look worse by outshining him any chance he could. One day he took it too far, and during the annual hunt, Frederick fell from his horse before all the lords and ministers. My father was enraged and considered it an embarrassment.”
Her eyes widened in concern. “Did he hit him?”
“Father never hit us; yelled at and berated us, yes, but he did not strike us…however, our mother was a different story. He blamed her for Frederick’s weak condition. I’d watched him strike her all my life, always feeling far too small to do anything about it. But I was not small any longer, and this time when he raised his hand to her…I…I lost my composure. I struck him hard. Not just once either. It was as if my entire mind were painted black. I could not see anything. When they pulled me off of him, his face was covered in blood. And they all looked at me as if I were the monster. They knew what he was like, yet I was the monster because he was the king.”
“They banished you for that? You were just trying to protect your mother.”
I laughed bitterly, because she truly did not get it. “Who do you think forced me to leave while his face recovered? My mother privately gave the order.”
“But why? Surely—”
“He is the king and she is his queen. Nothing and no one else is above that except God.”
The frown on her face was so strong, I would not have been surprised if her mouth got forever stuck that way.
“What an awful mess.”
“Yes, so be grateful that your family at least sees your efforts as good. Be satisfied that you have a family that is so deeply concerned for your well-being. Not even royals are guaranteed to get that.”
“What have you been doing since you left your home?” she asked, her eyes peering into mine, not at all listening to my advice for her.
“Do not look so concerned. I’ve been having a grand time. I went on tour, then visited other relatives. I have quite a few of them, and very few know of what transpired, so I am still treated honorably and well. Lukas only found out after I said too much over drinks. On top of which I have newfound freedom to indulge in all my most passionate interests.”
“Such as women.” She held the next page up for me to see. “This one must be a favorite, she comes up a lot.”
My eyebrow rose as I glanced over to her. She was clearly teasing me but for some reason I felt she also wished to lift the mood. “Lady Hathor, do not be so bold. We are not friends, remember?”
“Yes, of course. We are enemies divulging our vulnerabilities after declaring a truce, as is custom nowhere.”
“Exactly.”
She giggled and I grinned.
“So, what do you believe the ending of your sad story will be, Prince Wilhelm?”
I was taken aback by the question. No one had ever asked that before.
“I do not know. What do you believe yours shall be?”
“I shall be much beloved by my husband, have many children, and grow old on a grand estate.”
“How precise and boring. Do you not wish to do something else? See the world perhaps?”