Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 89536 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 448(@200wpm)___ 358(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89536 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 448(@200wpm)___ 358(@250wpm)___ 298(@300wpm)
No less than I would do for any of my sisters, though Gloria basically does live with me when she gets sick of our parents.
“Who else knows?” Buzz wants to know, following her into the kitchen.
“Tripp. Chandler. Molly.” True lets the silence linger a few seconds. “And now you.”
So few people.
Her shoulders rise and fall as she breathes out a puff of air. “I had to tell someone. Molly said it wasn’t healthy for me to keep the secret, and it wasn’t good for the baby to keep the news to myself.”
“Molly,” Buzz repeats. “The fifteen-year-old neighbor kid said that?”
“Yeah.”
“Pause.” He cocks his head to one side, tapping his hands in the universal gesture for time out. “You told the neighbor kid before you told me?”
Here we go again…
“I mean, she’s the one who found me throwing up in Tripp’s toilet, Buzz. What did you want me to do!”
His face contorts. “Ew.”
“See! You are so unbelievable! You just said you wanted me to stay at your house, but then you say ‘ew’ when I mention puking!”
“Not the same thing. You made no mention of barfing—which is gross. I’d rather it be in his toilet, unless you’re done having morning sickness, in which case the offer is back on.” He’s leaning against the counter now, more at ease than he was a few minutes ago, which is a good sign.
“So now what do we do?”
We.
As if this is a team effort.
Team Espinoza-Wallace doesn’t have the worst ring to it.
True throws her arms around her brother, and I hear a little sob escape her throat as she hugs him.
“Thank you. I love you,” she gushes. “I was so scared to tell you.”
We’re all smiling and laughing—and sure, mine may be a little forced because I’m still terrified Buzz might haul off and decide he still wants to nail me in the nads, but all in all…
It couldn’t have gone any better.
Besides, if True is right and Buzz and Hollis are having a baby too, then he’s keeping secrets of his own and will need our forgiveness when they finally break the news.
Nineteen
True
We.
There’s that word they love using.
I become emotional when my brother tosses out the ‘we’ word the same way Molly uses it. The same way Tripp uses it. The same way Mateo uses it.
We.
As in: we are a team.
You are not doing this alone.
Why I ever thought I was alone is beyond me.
It’s because I wasn’t in a relationship when I got the news, and I thought that somehow made me…alone in all this.
But I’m not alone at all. I’m surrounded by people who love me, and shame on me for forgetting that.
I should have known it would be like this the second I stepped over Tripp’s threshold, my brothers always stepping in to protect me.
Nothing has changed over the years.
A tear stains my cheek and I wipe it away.
“Jesus, do not start to cry on us,” Tripp warns, but it’s too late.
I am crying big, wet tears.
Ugly ones too, I’m sure.
Mateo rises from the couch and walks to stand beside me, gently rubbing my back in the same slow circles he was using on the couch before.
Feels so good.
“She’s been doing this all week,” Tripp informs Buzz, the expert—at least in his mind—on everything I do since I’ve been living in his house.
“How would you know? You haven’t even been home in days,” I shoot back with a sniffle. He’s been out of town playing in whatever football game he played in, in whichever city.
“Can we get back to the part where José is banging my sister? I’m shook.” Buzz shoots a pointed glance at Mateo, glaring at him. “I trusted you, man.”
Luckily, Mateo doesn’t have to defend himself because Tripp continues playing peacemaker. “What is the big deal, Buzz? For god’s sake, what is the big deal? This could have been some asshole we know nothing about, some schmuck who’s only using her—but it’s someone we know, and Christ, can’t you just admit he’s a decent guy? It could be worse.” He looks over at me. “No offense, True.”
Um. None taken?
They argue about it as if Mateo and I aren’t standing in the same room, going round and round about Mateo being a teammate and bro code this and bro code that.
“Could you not!” I yell, interrupting. “Guys! Guys. None of this is helping—I don’t need to stand here and listen to this.” I put my hand on Mateo’s arm. “We’re…doing this together, whatever that looks like. We don’t know. But I’m not going to let you treat him like garbage because I slept with him.”
“Uh, are you forgetting the baby part?”
My hands go to my stomach and I rub. “Of course I haven’t forgotten.”
“Are you…” Buzz hesitates. “Excited?”
“Yes.”
Beside me, Mateo is nodding too. “Very. My family is going to flip.”