Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 77816 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77816 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
Carlos’s lip curls up in a half smile. “I’m going to be nosy and ask how that’s going?”
I lift a shoulder, unsure how to even describe my feelings on the matter. When my gaze meets his, I admit, “It’s just weird.”
His head cocks to the side. “How so?”
Carlos knows a bit about our breakup. As we’ve hung out from time to time over the years, he was an easy ear to listen to my frustrations with the demise of my and Nash’s relationship. Carlos was close to Nash as well, and while he never told me anything that Nash might have said to him, I knew he sympathized with us both.
With a sigh, I lean back into the chair. “I don’t know. There was so much anger when we broke up that we just… parted ways and never really said goodbye to each other.” He left our apartment after our fight and then didn’t come back. After a full day and night, I was pissed. I was convinced he’d gone out to party with friends and possibly women. That was more important to him than coming home and trying to convince me to put that ring back on. My stubborn pride had me leaving with only a very short note of farewell.
And Nash never once tried to call or text me. I took that to mean he was glad it was over, and man, did that hurt.
Then it made me angry and bitter toward him, and I’ve never been able to let that go.
“Where did you go, Bex?” Carlos chides, and I blink at him.
He comes into focus, and I feel my cheeks heat. “Sorry… went down memory lane without you, I guess.” I clear my throat, sit straighter in the chair. “Like I said… it’s weird, but we haven’t tried to kill each other yet.”
“And you haven’t seen him since you broke up?”
“Once,” I say, remembering that visit to his hospital room after the crash. I was watching his race on TV and when I saw the flames, I about died a thousand terrifying deaths. “I went to see him in the hospital. The day after the crash.”
Carlos can hear it in my voice. It was not a pleasant experience. “What happened?”
I grimace, remembering how horrible Nash had looked. His face was red with second-degree burns, his hands wrapped because of third-degree burns. He was heavily medicated, given the extent of his injuries. When I first walked in, he stared at me through a fog, but then I could see the moment when he realized who I was. I’ve never seen eyes go so cold before. “He was not happy to see me,” I admit quietly. “Asked me to leave.”
Actually yelled at me, except his voice was raspy and abraded. I didn’t miss the enmity, though. “Get the fuck out, Bex, and don’t come back.”
There was so much venom in his words, I felt like I’d been slapped. I took a step backward, unsure of what to do. His manager, Greg Persons, happened to walk into the room at that moment. Because he can handle any situation, he took me by the arm and gently steered me out.
“Now’s not a good time, Bex,” he said gently. “He’s in a lot of pain, on medication…”
“I just… I just wanted to make sure he’s okay,” I said lamely. I had no idea why I was there, other than when I thought he might die, I thought I’d die too.
“I know,” he said with a hand on my shoulder.
I had no clue how badly injured he was, so I asked, “Will he be able to race again?”
Greg’s face clouded with uncertainty. “I don’t know. His hands are badly burned. He’s going to need reconstructive surgery and if he can retain flexibility, I’m sure he can.”
“His voice… is that from the fire?” I asked. When Nash had croaked the hateful words at me, they sounded like they caused him physical pain.
Greg shook his head slowly, his mouth turning downward. “His vocal cords got injured from screaming.”
I gasped, my hand going to my mouth and tears pooling. “The pain from the burns?”
Again, he shook his head. “Screaming at Matteo. Trying to get at him to help free him from his car. Matteo was screaming in agony, and Nash was screaming in horror as he watched him burn to death.”
I had never, until that moment, had emotion make me sick, but I tore away from Greg and ran down the hall before I threw up in front of him. I had to take deep gulping breaths to force the nausea away and I didn’t stop running until I was in the parking lot. I couldn’t bear to think of what Nash had been through and the journey he’d have to recover. I couldn’t stand to think about it because I knew I had no place at his side to help him, and the only thing I could do was once again shut that door on that part of my life and hope he would be okay.