Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 77874 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77874 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
It’s not your fault, East…it’s because you won’t let go of me, and because we were never taught how.
Ella’s right in some ways. Morgan and Rhett had Mom to learn from, Mom to love them. And though I know how much my brothers gave up for me, it’s because they didn’t have a choice. They did it because my father wanted nothing to do with me.
“Gregory’s been calling him,” I admit. “He said he’s not answering.”
“You saw him?” The hurt in Morgan’s voice cuts deep. Damn it. Why hadn’t I thought about that before I’d spoken?
Why did Rhett see me and not Morgan?
“Just because he was afraid I’d done something wrong again.”
Morgan sighs and doesn’t question my response.
“Gregory was calling Morgan too. We blocked his number,” Dusty says, and I’m not surprised that the only person he’s not calling is me. He never cared and never will. He told me I’m not a Swift anymore, but the thing is, I don’t think he ever saw me as one.
“If it’s for me, neither you nor Rhett have to do that.”
“It’s for us,” Morgan says. “All of us. He’s like a disease that has been eating away at our relationship, at our lives, for too long.”
My gaze finds Archer, who’s watching me. Most of the shit with Gregory, he’s unfamiliar with, but he’s getting an idea of how fucked up my family is. Will that be the thing that makes him run? He’s not used to that. His family are close, he’s said so himself.
“We should go. I need to check on the dogs,” I say.
“Yeah. Okay. Thanks for coming, East. Maybe the four of us can hang out sometime. You also need to have me over for dinner soon, otherwise I’ll just show up again,” my brother teases.
“He’s a good cook.” Archer grins like he’s proud to pump me up to Morgan and Dusty, but all he just did was let them know I’ve cooked for him, something I’ve done a few times since we started fucking. It’s showing them more ways in which my life and Archer’s have become entwined.
“Why is it that both Morgan and Archer have tasted your food, and I haven’t?” Dusty asks.
“Because they’re annoying and stalk me more than you do.”
They all laugh at my response.
And of course Ella pipes up then. You should do it, have Morgan and Dusty over. Dusty’s been good to you. He cares about you and trusts you.
She’s right, he does. Hell, Dusty had been willing to let me run his business if he moved to California with Morgan.
“We can do that sometime…have you both over. Casanova needs to get to know you both anyway. Plus, Pretty Girl loves Morgan for some reason.” It’s easier to use my dogs as an excuse, though I’m not dumb enough to think they don’t see what I’m doing.
Archer’s hand comes down on my shoulder. He gives a gentle squeeze, then slides it to my nape and lets it rest there. I should move it, step away, but I don’t.
Morgan watches Archer holding on to me, but Dusty does a better job at pretending to ignore it. “I’d like that.”
My skin is itchy because I’m ready to get out of there.
“See you guys later,” Archer tells them, and we head for the door. Once we’re in the car, he says, “I’m proud of you.”
Thank you. “It’s sad, though, isn’t it? That you’re proud of me for something like that?”
“I think it’s sad that there have been things in your life that have beat you down so much, even making an invitation to dinner is difficult. I’m sad for everything you’ve lost and that there’s a whole lot more going on than most people realize. You and your brothers are carrying around more trauma than anyone sees. It’s sad that I didn’t know sooner because I would have done everything in my fucking power to help make it better for you, East.”
I nod, look out the window. “Can we go?”
“Yeah. Of course we can.”
I watch the scenery pass by. The weather will start cooling off even more soon, and before we know it, we’ll be buried in snow. “I like the snow,” I say.
“Yeah? I don’t mind it. Makes everything beautiful. Just cold as fuck.”
“Ella loved it. We used to have snowball fights, and I’d always let her win. I let her win everything, have everything, because it felt good to make her happy.”
Archer’s warm, strong hand lands on my thigh. “You’re a good brother. She knew that.”
But I wasn’t. Not really.
Tell him something, East. You can trust him. Ella’s voice is soft in my head.
“Morgan and Rhett practically raised me and Ella. Gregory has always hated me.”
“I’m sure he didn’t—”
“He did, but that’s not what this is about. I just thought I should give you something, want to give you something. Rhett and Morgan never got along, at least not that I remember. Rhett got to go to college, but Morgan had to stay local to take care of me and El…and then just me… Morgan hated Rhett, hated Gregory. He maybe hated the whole damn world except for Dusty James. One night, after Rhett returned and before Morgan left for California, Dusty and Rhett kissed. It was dumb. I think Rhett did it because he was hurting and jealous of Morgan, and Dusty did it because he loved Morgan and was losing him, but Morgan saw them, and that anger has festered ever since. Morgan is trying to get past it now, but for whatever reason, Rhett can’t.”