Total pages in book: 65
Estimated words: 63702 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63702 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 319(@200wpm)___ 255(@250wpm)___ 212(@300wpm)
I want to tell him that I would almost do anything to make that happen, but I know that it won’t. I can speak a thousand lies, but the truth will never come through, because the truth would destroy him. I know I’m running out of time. I don’t want the club involved. I don’t want Colt to feel any backlash for the decision I made, and for that, I know I need to get money and I need to get this monster off my back.
Colt can never know, and I know deep in my heart, that I’ll never be able to live the rest of my life with him, knowing that I killed his sister. I can never walk down the aisle and promise for better or worse. I can never bring a child into this world with him, knowing what kind of person I am inside. I can’t give him anything that I so wish I could, but for now, he can’t know that.
“I’ll try harder,” I say, meeting his gaze. “I’m sorry.”
“Never be sorry for feelin’ the things you feel. Always tell me what hurts and I’ll do what I can to fix it.”
My heart is splitting in two at the thought of never seeing this man again. When I’m done here, I know I have to leave. I’ll have to pack up and move on, never looking back. I can’t tell him. I have to disappear and ensure he doesn’t find me. If I don’t, he’ll never let me go. I know it’ll hurt him, but that’s the only way he’ll let me stay gone. Is if he’s so angry at me that he doesn’t come looking.
I hate that I have to do that to him.
Phone ringing, I glance down at the screen to see my niece, Myla, calling. I flash it towards Colt, to let him know I have to take it, then I turn and walk away. Pressing the phone to my ear, I answer it.
“Hi Aunty,” Myla chirps on the other end.
She’s so special to me.
I love her more than I could ever love myself.
She didn’t have it easy and when I was presented with the chance to take her in and raise her, I didn’t hesitate. She is like a daughter to me, and even though we’re not too far apart in age, she has always respected me. Mostly, I hope she looks up to me. I never want her to know the kind of monster I am inside. I would hate for that light to leave her eyes when she smiles in my direction.
“Hi honey,” I say to her. “How is your trip?”
“It’s good. The drive is taking forever, but it’ll be worth it. How are you? I haven’t heard from you in a few weeks. I thought I’d check in.”
“Everything here is great,” I lie.
Myla has visited a few times since I’ve been with Colt, and she loves the house. At least, that’s what she tells me. She mostly spent her time partying, but it was so good to have her here. I miss her.
“I want to come visit again soon,” she goes on, the sound of laughter in the background muffling her voice. “I miss you.”
“I miss you, too. Go on, it sounds like you’re having fun. I’ll call you later.”
“Okay. As long as you’re okay?”
I’m not.
I’ll never be okay again.
“I’m great. Love you.”
“Love you more.”
Hanging up the phone, I fight back the tears.
Glancing over my shoulder, I see Colt staring at me, his eyes narrowed.
It doesn’t matter what I say, he knows something is wrong.
Don’t worry, Colt. You won’t have to wonder much longer.
Soon, I’ll be out of your life forever.
17
Dear Chloe,
Fuck you.
There’s no other way to put it.
You ruined my life.
You took everything from me.
You fucking broke my heart.
You don’t deserve this letter.
Hell, you don’t deserve the air I breathe.
That doesn’t matter now anyway, because you’re gone.
You’re gone, but she’s here.
Did you do that on purpose?
Did you send her to that house—our house—to rub it in?
To remind me of the raw and fractured mess you left?
I bet you’re laughing. I know you are.
You wanted to take the knife and twist it one more time.
You wanted to make sure I forever remembered the gaping wound you left.
Well, as far as I’m concerned, you’re not only dead in the ground but you’re dead to me, too.
I’ll never breathe your name again.
I’ll never give you the satisfaction.
As for her ... maybe I’ll make it my mission to ensure she suffers.
So you can look down from above, screaming for me to stop, knowing there isn’t a single thing you can do to make me.
That’ll be my revenge.
I couldn’t do it to you but can do it to her.
You’ll regret sending her to me.
Enjoy the show.
Colt.
I stare down at the letter and my fingers tremble.