Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 119650 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 479(@250wpm)___ 399(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119650 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 598(@200wpm)___ 479(@250wpm)___ 399(@300wpm)
Tanner pauses and drops his forehead to mine, his chest heaving with heavy breaths. “Please, Killer,” he whispers. “Give me a chance to make this right. I know I don’t deserve you, and I know just how badly I screwed up. But the thought of you walking away before we even get a chance to see where this could go … fuck, Bri. I don’t want to live in a world where I don’t have you beside me.”
My gaze drops as his hands fall to my shoulders and slowly make their way down to my hands, clutching them tight as though he’ll never let them go. “You said all I’ll ever be is a whore shaking her ass for a dollar.”
Tanner cringes, his whole face scrunching with pain. “Fuck, babe,” he says, his grip tightening on my hands as his forehead drops to my shoulder. “Surely you know I don’t really think that. Just the thought of another man looking at you tears me to shreds.”
“You said I was the reason you weren’t at the hospital with Addison,” I remind him. “I know that’s not true and that you were just trying to lash out to ease your own guilt, but words like that sting, Tanner. Do you have any idea how much guilt I’ve carried over that? I never asked you to stay with me, and I sure as hell would never try to take you away from the time you spend with your sister.”
Tanner grabs my face, forcing my eyes to his as he holds me close, his lips barely a whisper from mine. “I know that,” he insists. “Trust me, I fucking know that, and I will never stop being sorry for everything I said, and I sure as fuck won’t apologize for spending the night with you, especially after Colby wrapped you around a fucking tree. That was my decision and mine alone. The blame is on me. I never should have said that to you.”
I shake my head, agreeing with him wholeheartedly. “You couldn’t have known Colby was going to attack your sister. You can’t blame yourself for not being able to predict the future. He snuck into her room the minute your mom stepped out, so whether you were there or not, he still would have found his moment to attack.”
Tanner presses his lips into a hard line. “I should have been there.”
“Don’t do that to yourself,” I tell him. “I know you want to always protect the people you care about, but you can’t always be everybody’s hero. The world doesn’t work like that.”
He lets out a heavy sigh, refusing to hear me. “Tell me you’ll forgive me, or at the very least, that it’s not over.”
I lean into him and press my lips to his ever so gently, wanting so much more but refusing to allow it. I pull back, breaking our kiss. “It’s not over, Tanner,” I tell him, my hands finding his again. “How could it ever be over?”
His brows furrow, searching my eyes. “But yesterday before class, you said—”
“I know what I said,” I tell him, remembering the exact moment I told him I was done. “But that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook. You hurt me, Tanner. You lost control and used me as your punching bag, and I can’t just forget the things you said to me. You broke me, and it’s going to take time for that to heal. But I understand your situation, and while I want to pulverize you into dust right now, I also don’t think it’s completely fair to hold it against you. It was a mistake made out of desperation, and I just hope the next time you lose control, you’ll have the sense to work with me, rather than against me.”
“I swear to you, Killjoy,” he promises. “No matter what happens between you and me or with my sister, I won’t lose control like that again.”
“You can’t promise me that, especially now that everything is getting even more screwed up.”
His lips press into a hard line and he nods. “Maybe not,” he says, understanding the situation all too well. “But I can promise to work on myself. I saw how much I hurt you, and trust me, it didn’t feel good. I don’t ever want to make you feel like that again.”
I nod and bring his hands to my chest, needing him close. “I’m not ready to just jump straight back into where we were before.”
“I get it,” he says. “You need time, but at least now I know I can sneak into your room without getting my head chopped off.”
An ugly scoff catches in my throat. “Don’t count on it,” I laugh.
Tanner leans into me and presses his lips to mine. “Don’t act like you don’t love it,” he laughs, wrapping his arms around me and lifting me off the counter. He walks out of the bathroom, and we crash onto his bed, my arms wrapped tightly around his neck. Tanner kisses me again, much deeper than before, and it’s just enough to satisfy the need I’ve felt for him over the past few days.