Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 68599 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 343(@200wpm)___ 274(@250wpm)___ 229(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 68599 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 343(@200wpm)___ 274(@250wpm)___ 229(@300wpm)
Was he running from me again?
After the hottest fucking moment of my entire life?
9
HARLAN
I splashed cold water on my face, trying to stem the rush of emotion that was landing on me like a heavy waterfall.
Why, why, why? Why did this have to happen now? When I should have been out there cuddling with the only person on the planet I loved so much?
But it was all hitting me at once. What we’d done. How incredible it had felt.
Wanting anything this badly was dangerous. And when it was him? Devastating, potentially, if it fucked up anything that he and I had built together. Any change in our relationship felt like a change to the whole life I knew, the entire ground I walked on.
And tonight felt like an earthquake.
It wasn’t just about what I’d been through with Sawyer, but what I’d been through with Thomas, so many years ago. I was scared. I was fucking scared, deep down, underneath the exterior of gruff, masculine independence that I always showed to the world.
Sawyer had always been a part of my heart as my best friend. But how was I supposed to let him in if I admitted I wanted everything with him?
I’d been in front of the sink for a minute when I heard the sound of the floorboards in the bedroom gently creaking. I turned off the tap and turned to see Sawyer there behind me, leaning in the doorframe of the bathroom.
Naked. And incredible. Every inch of him was like a statue, carved from marble.
I pulled in a slow breath.
“Talk to me,” he said softly, reaching out to take my hand. “I just turned on the fireplace. Come get in bed and watch the snow fall with me?”
He squeezed my hand hard, and I felt paralyzed. I wanted to tug him into a kiss. I wanted to cover his body with mine, to tackle him back onto the bed, to lick him and bite him and let him know exactly how perfect he was.
I also wanted to run far away, before I could let myself face the fear of being close with him. I was a goddamn confused mess, inside, and as usual, I had no idea how to express those emotions.
I just nodded at him. “Let’s go.”
I padded back out over the hardwood and tucked in next to him under the covers. The sheets felt incredible against my skin, and I let myself live in the moment, breathing deep, trying not to think about things. One wall of the room glowed with the beautiful orange flames of the fireplace, and the other side had big paned windows looking out at the blizzard.
Sawyer scooted up close to me under the sheets, letting one arm drape over my stomach. His fingertips swirled in little circles on my skin.
“Tell me what’s on your mind,” Sawyer said. “No bullshit. Nothing to be afraid of. It’s me.”
I shifted, breathing in the fresh scent of his hair, feeling crazed by the amount of desire I had for him.
“Well, the first thing on my mind,” I offered, “is that this fireplace looks pretty damn good for being an inferior product.”
Sawyer snorted a laugh. “You hate gas fireplaces.”
“Wood-burning is just better, and everyone knows it,” I said. “But I’ll allow it in this hotel room. Just for tonight.”
“It does look nice, doesn’t it?”
“Don’t you dare repeat this to anyone, ever,” I said, holding up my hand. “But if I didn’t know this one was a gas fireplace, I might even be tricked to believe it was wood-burning. Only for a few seconds, and then I’d find out, of course.”
“Wow.”
“Like I said. Don’t repeat that.”
Sawyer snickered. “I wouldn’t dream of it. We can’t have all of Jade River thinking you support gas fireplaces.”
“Thank you, Sawyer,” I said. “That’s why I love you.”
He nuzzled in a little closer to me, and my words hung in the air. Telling him I loved him had never felt more true than it did now, and it gave me a fizzle of excitement in my chest to say it while he was cuddled up naked against me.
He hummed softly beside me. “And what else is on your mind, after we both just sucked each other off and you gave me one of the best blow jobs of my life?”
He may as well have just splashed cold water all over my face. My heart rate shot up, and I wondered if he could feel how fast it was beating, pressed up against my side.
No hesitation. Full honesty. I sucked in a breath and put one arm around him, giving him a squeeze.
“It feels fucking terrifying,” I told him.
“My blow job was terrifying?” he exclaimed, like he was personally offended I’d said it. “I know I’m not experienced, but…”
“Oh, shut up,” I said, laughing even though my heart was still pounding. “You sucking my dick was probably one of the best things I’ve ever felt in my life, actually.”